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First Baptist
| Open Poetry #44 |
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First Baptist |
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Huan Yi Member Ascendant
since 2004-10-12
Posts 6688Waukegan 
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. Green leaves Slowly stir In gray air Beyond Low hills In a valley Not far from here The fallen ruins Of a small town The main road A bed of weeds What buildings there are With their wooden eaves Lean precariously Against the wind An empty church Its windows broke Now heaven for spiders Crickets and timid mice Shadows of symbols On faded walls Scraps from a bible Torn and strewn On the dusty floor Hardly legible A word or two Faith Love The pains Of Hell Which it seems Is something Of an equation . |
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steavenr Member Elite
since 2003-11-17
Posts 4058 |
"Faith Love The pains Of Hell Which it seems Is something Of an equation" ...hmmm...thought-provoking, sigh-inducing & unfortunately, and painfully all too real...nice job |
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secondhanddreampoet Member Ascendant
since 2006-11-07
Posts 6394a 'Universalist' ! |
GRAND imagery ... wonderfully PERFECT ending ! significant and sustained applause for this most effective 'penning' !! |
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Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
"An empty church Its windows broke Now heaven for spiders Crickets and timid mice Shadows of symbols On faded walls" Well done visual imagery. Interesting word choice, heaven as opposed to haven. |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Fine writing...James |
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Kaoru
since 2003-06-07
Posts 3892where the wild flowers grow |
"Faith Love The pains Of Hell" Very cool write, and also an honesty some find hard to fathom. |
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