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SlowlyFallAway
Member

since 2008-08-29

Posts 279
North Carolina

0 posted 2009-01-12 05:43 PM

The pressure was on
I could tell you wanted a story to take with you
Along with my innocence
Because what good is a story with no climax?
But now that I'm 3 months along
Where the hell are you?
You left me face down in a pile of regrets
That wasn't me talking that night
You never seemed to mind
It all goes back to the story you were wanting so bad to tell
But now that I'm 3 months along
Don't you think I deserve a little more?
You have your story
I see its wearing off quickly
And you're already looking for another one
I have no say in the matter
No way to stop you from screwing another innocent victim over
But now that I'm 3 months along
You can't just leave me alone

Ill watch you fade into the back of my mind
The way you watched me fade to the back of the room

3 months since that nightmare

But now I carry a dream inside of me

And when that dream comes true
You won't have any part in it

January 12th 2009
Emily Shives

amusemi
Senior Member

since 2001-12-08

Posts 1262
A State of Disarray

1 posted 2009-01-14 03:03 AM

There seems to be lot of pain, yet hope, in this. enjoyed!

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean

since 2002-08-27

Posts 40215
Realms of Light

2 posted 2009-01-15 09:20 AM

"Ill watch you fade into the back of my mind
The way you watched me fade to the back of the room"

~ Memorable lines! Very effective in illustrating your perspectives.

"3 months since that nightmare

But now I carry a dream inside of me"

~ Your positive attitude will hold both you and your baby in good stead.

Wishing you and your little dream bundle all the best!!!

EA

steavenr
Member Elite

since 2003-11-17

Posts 4058

3 posted 2009-01-17 12:13 PM

this is such an emotive write...a true heart-wrencher...Earth Angel calls these lines memorable (a good summary)

"3 months since that nightmare

But now I carry a dream inside of me"

...I like the stark contrast you build for them...an excellent write

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