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Beach Park
| Open Poetry #44 |
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Beach Park |
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Huan Yi Member Ascendant
since 2004-10-12
Posts 6688Waukegan 
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. A glance A gaze perhaps A single gesture A moment In the life you have Made to pause Even without Her summer leaves In falling snow The slender willow Is beautiful A gibbous moon The sky at dusk From blue to pink And blue again Under a sea Of silver stars . |
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| © Copyright 2009 John Pawlik - All Rights Reserved | |||
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secondhanddreampoet Member Ascendant
since 2006-11-07
Posts 6394a 'Universalist' ! |
fine impressionistic imagery ... particularly the ending: "Even without Her summer leaves In falling snow The slender willow Is beautiful A gibbous moon The sky at dusk From blue to pink And blue again Under a sea Of silver stars" serious applause for the 'write'! |
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Marge Tindal 
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
John~ Absolutely stunning~ *Huglets*  ~*Marge*~ ~*The sound of a kiss is not as strong as that of a cannon, but it's echo endures much longer*~ |
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Marchmadness Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 9271So. El Monte, California |
You have frozen a moment in time here, John and created a beautiful picture. Ida |
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2islander2 Member Ascendant
since 2008-03-12
Posts 6825by the sea |
delightful. yann |
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Ratleader
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass |
Thank you once again for a poetry lesson, as well as a very pleasant read. The way you build such a strong atmosphere in so few words, is worth studying, not just enjoying. ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº> ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº> |
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Marc-Andre Senior Member
since 2008-12-07
Posts 501 |
"Even without Her summer leaves In falling snow The slender willow Is beautiful A gibbous moon The sky at dusk From blue to pink And blue again" I have little to no appreciation of either free verse or the Japanese forms. And every time I click on one of your posts, I ask myself "why?" But something kept me clicking and reading your poems. Today, I know why. Those two stanzas are simply stunning, the best ones you've written so far (my opinion.)The images you've brought to my mind are crystal clear, and the experience is delightful. Have a marvelous day! Mark |
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Huan Yi Member Ascendant
since 2004-10-12
Posts 6688Waukegan |
. Thank you all, Posts will be less frequent as I'm taking something of a rest, yet I'll still try when I do to give you something worth reading. Thanks again John |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
Such moments often make the life. *S* This is beautiful... Whatever the wait between posts, you always make it worthwhile. *S* |
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steavenr Member Elite
since 2003-11-17
Posts 4058 |
sorry to hear about the fewer posts, so I will use the one word I keep in reserve for the best writes--pretty, it is pretty |
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