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Open Poetry #44
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critical mass
Member
since 2009-03-25
Posts 275
Michigan

0 posted 2009-04-05 11:24 AM


I heard you crying
and I wondered if
maybe you need a friend
what seems to be the matter
                            Well I wish that I were dead
Now that is quite
a mouthful said
for such a little guy
                            I'm not that small and you should
                            leave before you make him mad
I'm not afraid
to stay with you
if you would like to talk
                            Theres nothing I can say  
                            to make you fully understand
I'm not some stranger to you
I know all about your life
for I was born into this box
it is my mothers womb
                             Then it is you, I've heard you
                             one or twice inside my head
Yes that was me
behind your eyes
                             what do you want from me
I'm here to help
you cope with him
and we will set you free
                             I won't be free until I'm dead
                             I've seen this in my dreams
Your dreams
are really not that close
to your reality
I am the hope
you've prayed for
                           You're an angel from above
                              
I'm not an Angel
heaven sent
at least I don't think so
I'm just a part of you
or maybe
you are part of me
                         I knew that you would come for me
today's the day my friend
                       what happens when it's over
there will still be you and me
                    And you will stay inside this box
and you can go your way
                  I think that I will miss you
hush, it's time to take away the pain
              will you ever come back for me
someday when you are strong
          I feel you in my bruises
         they don't hurt me any more
I feel your smile is coming back
      I'm losing my control
I see you're rising from the box
  I think that we have won
we have and now it's time for you
to run along and play

I hope that I will see you
in the man that we'll become


I woke up in a wooden box my hands behind my back
The bruises puffed my eyes and urine choked the stagnant air
and somewhere in the distance I could hear a laughing child
play marbles in the driveway with a cool breeze in his hair.
  
It really doesn't matter who created who that day
If it was he created me or possibly the other way
I didn't mind the darkness I was born into that chest
where a child was dividing, into what he thought was best



© Copyright 2009 critical mass - All Rights Reserved
suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
1 posted 2009-04-05 01:29 PM


This... breaks my heart.

Superb write!

Robert E. Jordan
Member Rara Avis
since 2008-01-25
Posts 8541
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
2 posted 2009-04-06 03:03 PM


Yo Critical mass,

This is a good poem.

Everyone should do what's best.  That's your job in life.

Bobby

critical mass
Member
since 2009-03-25
Posts 275
Michigan
3 posted 2009-04-07 06:10 AM


suthern

sorry about that


Robert E. Jordan


thanx
apparently it is

latearrival
Member Ascendant
since 2003-03-21
Posts 5499
Florida
4 posted 2009-04-19 11:55 AM



So much more you have to share.you wrote it beautifully. latearrival

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215
Realms of Light
5 posted 2009-04-19 12:56 PM


I have heard that someone who is able to develop other persona to help escape intolerable injustices that are perpetrated upon them, tend to have very bright and creative minds.

This aches beyond measure. Wrapping the inner child ~ and outer man ~ with a loving, compassionate hug.

Love & Child Light,

EA



critical mass
Member
since 2009-03-25
Posts 275
Michigan
6 posted 2009-04-19 01:16 PM


latearrival

Earth Angel

Thought this one was dead and gone into the cyber trash bin.
wasn't sure people would understand this one.

Thanks for the replies.

CM

unboundpoetess
Member
since 2008-05-24
Posts 477

7 posted 2009-04-19 09:30 PM


I'm looking around here wonderin'
how did I miss this?

I am having all sorts of emotions and really don't know what to say.

It's painful and hopeful. It makes me think of my husband and children I have loved. It's bruised and innocent and jaded and desperate and triumphant. It's lost and it's found.

Oh, I liked the way you gradually merged your lines for emphasis.
And I'm done, lol.


Heather

critical mass
Member
since 2009-03-25
Posts 275
Michigan
8 posted 2009-04-19 10:07 PM


unboundpoetess

I had a lot of trouble with the merging part of this. It still doesn't look the way I wanted it to but I guess it will have to do.
This one may be a tad over the top.
Thanks for reading and replying.
I'm glad you liked this.

CM

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