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Feelings

alcoholism is a b%$#@

Jabirah

Unregistered

New Member
Posts 5

0 posted 2004-11-09 04:21 AM

I watch him from the window
As he sits near the flowers,
And swiftly looks around.
He looks up to the skies
And seems to ponder about life.

I begin to wonder why life has been unfair.
As he sits on that chair, he seems to ponder of
things faraway.
His broken toe, his failing memory, his tired looks-
The abuse done to his body is painful to me.
I watch him and think:
How unfair it is to have a father such as him.
The broken promises, the broken spirits-
Many dreams vanished with each gulp of vodka.
Many tears shed for the man I call my father.

He seems to misunderstand his role-
And misuses his power.
He cares not for my feelings as selfish he is.
All the meanwhile, a heart is broken, dreams are
distant-
Hope vanished as vodka warms his body.

A flask in his hand,
A wound in his heart,
He looks down-
As tears slide down his face…

I look into my heart
And realize one thing.
This man I call my father
Is not selfish, he’s not evil.
He is a slave of his addiction.
A prisoner of society.

My soul is in conflict,
I love him but how do I help him?
All these emotions take over me,
I cannot watch him waste away anymore.
I run outside,
I stand before him.
He looks into my eyes
As his tormented soul screams for freedom.
I kneel down and hug him.
I look back into his eyes
And tell him I love him.

Midnitesun

Member Empyrean

since 2001-05-18

Posts 28647
Gaia

1 posted 2004-11-09 09:19 AM

Well, if this is your family situation, I am so sorry. But you can't help him unless he wants the help. That may sound trite, but it is true.
A rehab program or Al Anon may or may not help unless he wants to find a life outside of that bottle.
For what it's worth, I understand, as my father was an alcoholic, and too many other family members had this problem, this addiction. It's a living hell. Don't fall into the co-dependency trap, it doesn't help anyone.
I wish you luck, for all addictions tear apart the fabric of the family, and the one thing I'm sure of, is that he needs some professional, objective intervention, for there is a depression that accompanies this disease that family members alone cannot effectively address. Continue to love him, but don't help him stay within the bottle.

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