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This bird lost it's chirp, feeling blue today.
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This bird lost it's chirp, feeling blue today. |
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Miah Senior Member
since 2002-08-26
Posts 1062Pennsylvania 
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You know I'm so sick of being the chipper little bird. It's hard to always be the happy go lucky person. Right now I feel like running down the street screaming. I guess I'm just upset. 5 years ago my mom was diagnosed with Non-Hodgkins lymphoma. She was healthy for 5 whole years! two weeks ago she found a lump in her neck and it came back as cancer. I feel so lost, it's just not fair. Yesterday we found out that she will deal with this all her life, there is no cure for it, the only hope we have is longer and longer remmision periods. In a few weeks she will find out if it is anywhere else in her body. I really hope not. I know that some people have it worse then me, I know that some people don't have their parents. I don't mean to sound so selfish. I don't know, here I am 28 years old and crying out to God to make my Mommy better. Life feels like a peice of yarn thats beginning to unravel. There is so much going on in my life right now, that this is just the icing on the cake. Anyway, I just needed to get that off my chest. Thanks.  |
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| © Copyright 2003 J.B - All Rights Reserved | |||
KristieSue
since 2003-01-31
Posts 1460PA, US |
Miah, you have no need to explain or apologize away your not being chipper. In my mind, if anyone is chipper ALL of the time there is something wrong with them... I will keep your mom in my prayers. Keep me updated...and if you need to talk, you know how to get me. Failure isn't failure if a lesson from it is learned ~ KS |
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DbarrM Junior Member
since 2003-08-26
Posts 14 |
My thoughts and prayers go out to you and your mother. Spend every moment with her as if it was your last. And never hold anything back. If you do some day you will regret it. Everything happens for a reason. Some day you will find what this reason is. Stay strong but dont feel bad about being mad and sad. It takes a stronger person to show there emotions then to hide them away. DbarrM |
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Miah Senior Member
since 2002-08-26
Posts 1062Pennsylvania |
Thank you both for your kind words. I spend as much time with my mom as I can, life has been a bit foggy lately, or the reality of it all just has not hit me. My mom does not like to talk about it, so I don't usually mention anything or ask to many questions, besides I probably would break down and cry, and I know that is the last thing she needs right now. It's nice to come here, a haven in the center of a storm.  |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
The reality has hit you, Miah, and it's real, and it hurts. I know this feeling very well. Guess what? It never matters WHAT age a person is - when there is news like this, it pulls us up tight and we wonder where the air went. And, of course, around every corner hangs a miracle. I have friends in Houston who say if you want the best for those stricken with cancer, seek out M. D. Anderson as a possible venue for medical advice. http://www.mdanderson.org/ My husband and I considered M. D. Anderson when he was told he had a brain tumor. Once we found out it was benign, then local physicians at KU Med Center were able to step in and remove it. So far, so good...going on two years, and no recurrence. Of course, he will have a yearly MRI, and hang the cost, if they come back "clean". My prayers are with you and your mother, Miah. If you have any questions, or if I can help in any way, just e-mail me. Sunshine |
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Miah Senior Member
since 2002-08-26
Posts 1062Pennsylvania |
Sunshine, Thank you for your support, I try to get my mind off it, but I am finding out that is impossible to do. I will check out the link you gave me, I have been reading up on this type of cancer. Not much help though. She is getting another round of Chemo and raidation, she has to go to Pittsburgh to get a Cat scan done and a bone marrow scan. Lucky for us the doctor said that this is a slow growing cancer, but he said that she will always have this problem, their may be remission but there is no cure. I am glad your husband is doing well, it just goes to show that every day that God gives us is special. I love my mom so much I could not have asked for a better mother. Thank you so much for your advice and comforting words.  [This message has been edited by Miah (08-28-2003 03:37 PM).] |
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Kaoru
since 2003-06-07
Posts 3892where the wild flowers grow |
My mother has lupus, which is a sucky disease.. I can't say it's AS bad.. You don't have to be chipper, doll.. Let yourself feel, it's the only way to live. I hope the best for you and your mom. Mothers are so important, I can't go a day without speaking to or hugging mine. I know it must be hard for you, and I offer you my support, if you need it. E-mail me anytime. |
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