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Open Poetry #9
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Toerag and the Bear
| Open Poetry #9 |
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Toerag and the Bear |
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Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia 
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This poem was incited errr inspired by Long John who didn't want his name mentioned. Kethry Toerag came to Arkansaw Just to join the tribe And those lonesome cowboys Thought to take him for a ride. Toerag strolled up to the bar And put his money down How do I join this here, group I'm a stranger in this town Civilians started sniggering Cowboys placed their bets This was to be the greatest joke On poor old Toerag Fretts They offered up a challenge Disguised by parts of three To be part of this tribe you must Accept it gleefully. The first challenge was a drinking one Two bottles of straight gin The second was to make love to the lass who lived within The third the greatest challenge Toerag must take care The third and final challenge To shoot a grizzly bear. Toerag nodded sagely How hard could that be Drink the gin, woo the girl And shoot the Grizzly Done and done said Toerag As laughter flooded forth Two empty bottles later Toerag zig zagged to the north. The laughter swept behind him The bets were all called in When one old pioneer sighed "That's the last we'll see of him." Hours and hours later Toerag was back in town His eyes were bloodshot, bleary His face, it was cast down His skin was scratched and bloody He only had one boot Then he opened up his mouth and said "Where's that woman I'm to shoot." < !signature--> "It is the image in the mind that links us to lost treasures; but it is the loss that shapes the image, gathers the flowers weaves the garland."- [This message has been edited by Kethry (edited 09-01-2000).] |
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| © Copyright 2000 Lynne Dale - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Meadowmuse Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263 |
~ Hysterical ~ ~ Claire Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant?......Henry David Thoreau |
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SEA 
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
Kethry~ This is SO FUNNY!My sides hurt from laughing.....  -SEALive,Love,Laugh :) ~SueB |
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
Excellent....you are definitely in the same class with the others.ROFL...wonderful |
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sonjes Senior Member
since 2000-02-18
Posts 564North Carolina |
Oh...Too funny!!! I enjoyed every verse. Smiles much needed today.  |
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Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia |
Meadowmuse. Glad you liked it SEA. Thank you for the smiley. Mark Bonahan. Thank you for the kind words. I don't know about class, I would have said species. Sonjes. Thanks so much. Glad I brightened your morning. BTW does anyone know who Toerag is?   Kethry< !signature--> "It is the image in the mind that links us to lost treasures; but it is the loss that shapes the image, gathers the flowers weaves the garland."- [This message has been edited by Kethry (edited 08-31-2000).] |
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Sunnyone Member Ascendant
since 2000-07-06
Posts 5334Staffordshire, England |
Hi Kethry..... This sounds like something that Alaskans would be interested in!!! We have the 3B's up here..."Booze, Broads, and Bears" (No nasty letters please.....it's not my choice of words!!! Ha!!!) Today is a gift.... That is why they call it 'the Present'! |
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Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia |
Sunny1, the joke was originally set in Alaska but I couldn't think of an appropriate town with the right number of syllables at two in the morning. Hence Houston, now Arkansaw. Hope you liked the poem. Be well Kethry < !signature--> "It is the image in the mind that links us to lost treasures; but it is the loss that shapes the image, gathers the flowers weaves the garland."- [This message has been edited by Kethry (edited 09-01-2000).] |
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Eilidh Junior Member
since 2000-08-27
Posts 30 |
A new twist on an old joke. Very Funny  "There are times in life a kindred spirit comes along. Hold onto those people. They are what makes this life worth living."- Anon |
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LngJhnAg Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion |
Kethry This, I know for a fact, is a true story, but you have included one MAJOR inconsistency *heh heh* - Toerag would NEVER need two bottles of gin to become amorous with a grizzly, unless (of course) he used the gin to woo the grizzly. After all, grizzlies may be mean, vicious, ugly, tempermental, but they DO have standards *grin*. You've written this TRUE story very well, saving the punch line for the last. And, I suspect, you probably had fun writing the story in rhyme. After all, why do we like writing poetry? Because its fun! I often use old stories to help me overcome a very tempermental muse - the storyline is already developed, but the actual telling is up to me. Unlike many of the poets who frequent the Forums, I'm not very prolific when it comes to writing original material. I need somebody to challenge me with a specific subject in order to really write something original. That's one of the things I like about that rascally Balladeer and the ever-lovely Liz Santos. They have tremendous talent which includes originality. Now - as to Toerag - He's our usual foil because, when he can come in here, he reacts so well in his sometimes colorful responses. You can find a lot of his poetry back in the earlier pages of Open and Adults. Circumstances have taken him away from here for awhile, but I'm sure he will return. As a matter of fact, I introduced him to Forums right after I found this site a little over a year ago. I've known him for almost three years now, and he is quite a guy. |
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Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia |
Thank you Eilidh, Do I know you? email me if yes. Long John thanks for all that info, now that you've got me started I'll have to consider my next target errr victim errr honorary Kethry "It is the image in the mind that links us to lost treasures; but it is the loss that shapes the image, gathers the flowers weaves the garland."- |
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