Open Poetry #48 |
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conjured (rewrite) |
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suthern![]() ![]()
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana ![]() |
Your face filled my heart as I woke to morn - Before eyes opened or thoughts could be born There was you, there was want, but a cold bed Stretched beside me. It was all in my head. Your hands gave me shivers, when in the shower I turned to your kiss, anxious to devour The pleasures I knew you’d offer to me - But I was alone. The room was empty. Your arms coaxed me back from the kitchen sink. With your breath on my neck, I couldn't think Beyond knowing that all I have to give Belongs to you. You're the reason I live. Whether we're together or far apart, You fuel my fantasies and fill my heart. You star in my dreams, give song to my soul, You’re the one who completes me, makes me whole. Though we're separated by circumstance Remember - for me, you define romance! I long for the day our lives will entwine - Until then, you’re held close, here in my mind. |
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© Copyright 2012 suthern - All Rights Reserved | |||
Marilyn Member Elite
since 1999-09-26
Posts 2621Ontario, Canada |
Oh suthern your have me sobbing. I know this so well, though I have lost hope that he was ever meant for me regardless of the poetry he wrote for me. |
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JerryPat2 Member Laureate
since 2011-02-06
Posts 16975South Louisiana |
Touching poetry of being separated by happenstance, and the memories and fantasizes that are conjured p is beautifully rendered, Suthern. ~*~ they give you ruled paper write sideways. ~*~ |
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Startime1955 Senior Member
since 2012-04-22
Posts 1072Alberta, Canada |
I know this dream place well..,.I go there each night...real or not it brings my heart peace...*BIG HUGS* *may our dreams ever be magical* |
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latearrival Member Ascendant
since 2003-03-21
Posts 5499Florida |
lovely but too sad. Keep your spirits up. love ya, jo |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Nice...James |
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ebonygirl Member Elite
since 2011-07-14
Posts 2000California U.S.A |
Enjoyed the the tenderness in your poem, Suthern. Smiles, Ms. E |
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suthern![]() ![]()
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
Marilyn: I'm so sorry for your heartache, dear lady... May it soon ease and let your lungs breathe life... and dreams... again. (((hugs))) Jerry: Thank you so very much! Your kind comments are greatly appreciated! Startime: It does, doesn't it? *S* And peace is such a welcome companion! Thank you so much! latearrival: Thank you for finding it lovely in spite of the sadness... for that is the feeling experienced... and what I'd hoped to convey. *S* (((hugs!))) JamesMichael: Thank you very much! ebonygirl: Thank you so much, dear lady... I'm glad you enjoyed! *S* |
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Scooter Member
since 2012-07-10
Posts 68 |
Beautiful, romantic poetry. "The way to crush the bourgeoisie is to grind them between the millstones of taxation and inflation."-Vladimir Lenin |
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Nigelinoz Member
since 2012-07-24
Posts 71Victoria,Australia |
Oh suthern you spoke not just to my heart but to my very soul with that poem. Wow,just wow. Beautifully written,hauntingly lovely. Cheers N'oz |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Oh, the tricks one's mind plays on the heart... well done, suthern! |
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Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666California |
One can only heave a sigh of exasperation after reading this. Not sure how the first version of this went but it definately cleared the fence in this version. Enjoyed much, in my own sadistic, brooding manner. ![]() Michael |
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suthern![]() ![]()
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
Scooter: Thank you so very much! *S* N'Oz: Anytime one of my writes elicits a wow, I'm a happy poet! LOL Thank you! Sunshine: At least heart and mind agree on what SHOULD be. LOL Thank you! Michael: Exasperated? Sorry 'bout that. *S* Such conjuring certainly could be unwelcome... but in this case, I find it comforting. *S* |
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OwlSA Member Rara Avis
since 2005-11-07
Posts 9347Durban, South Africa |
Ruth, the day one stops dreaming and remembering, is the day one stops living in the true sense of the word. Your poem is very beautiful and tender. Owl |
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Toerag Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622Ala bam a |
And what about today? |
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suthern![]() ![]()
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
Owl: So very true!! *S* But I'm a dreamer... awake or sleeping! LOL Thank you very much! *S* Toerag: LOL... just shove a couple of Gulf states out of the way and I'll be there likitysplit! LOL It's SO good to see your name 'round these parts... thankee kindly, sir!!!! *S* |
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BluesSerenade Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549By the Seaside |
The mind is so powerful and full of wonder. Your poem gave me shivers and every word delighted me to no end. Love the romance, suthern gal!!! |
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suthern![]() ![]()
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
Thank you so much, Bluesy! I love your response! *S* |
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Alison![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2008-01-27
Posts 9318Lumpy oatmeal makes me crazy! |
I read this the day that you posted it, Ruth. and I fell in love with it. I can help shove those states out of the way if you need them gone. I have access to a bull dozer and know enough to make it doze. Not so great on the stopping, but I can go like hell! xoxoo Ali |
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Nigelinoz Member
since 2012-07-24
Posts 71Victoria,Australia |
I know I have commented before suthern but every time I read this I am struck by the sheer loveliness of it,it is emotional,lyrical,poignant and beautiful. Teach me how to write like this for my girlfriend in Utah and I would be a happy man. Just brilliant writing. Cheers N'oz You may as well give cherries to a pig as give advice to a fool- |
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JL Member Ascendant
since 2004-04-01
Posts 6128Texas, USA |
"Though we're separated by circumstance Remember - for me, you define romance! I long for the day our lives will entwine - Until then, you’re held close, here in my mind." This is a heart-breaker! ![]() Love the way you write and express your emotions. Really beautiful in a sad way... JL ![]() Love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul,and with all your mind. Love your neighbor as yourself. |
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Goldenrose Member Elite
since 2003-05-30
Posts 3665 |
Beautiful,sensuous,devotional and touching are all words that describe this poem but all do not come close to conveying how good this poem is and how good you are at writing it. Thank you for sharing it. Goldenrose. music was my refuge.i could crawl into the spaces between the notes and curl my back to loneliness - Maya Angelou |
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Margherita Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236Eternity |
quote: Exquisitely rendered longing, dear Ruth! Margherita |
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suthern![]() ![]()
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
Alison: Well, git yerself on down here, gal... time's a'wastin'!!! LOL Don't worry 'bout the stopping... sooner or later, it will run out of gas! LOL Thank you so much... for both the offer of assistance and the wonderful comment on the poem! *S* Love you, sweet lady! *S* Nigel: I always consider it a special compliment when a poet returns for another read... thank you!!! As for your lady... just write your heart - for it's your heart that matters. ![]() JL: Thank you so much!!! It's great to see you back on these blue pages! *S* Goldenrose: You make me blush, kind sir... thank you very much!! Margherita: Thank you so much, sweet lady!! *S* |
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luminosity Senior Member
since 2005-11-18
Posts 813 |
this is written sooooooo well, it almost brings back to remembrance 'those' feelings....that 'want', that 'desire'....but no....*shakes her head* those days are soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo long ago, I must insist I have forgotten them...course...it wouldn't hurt to read this again.....*smile* |
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Toerag Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622Ala bam a |
Um,your sister told me to leave? Don't understand, I explained the thing about all my clothes were in the laundry basket in the car? Geesch!!!!! |
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Marsha![]()
since 2000-07-10
Posts 7423Maidstone Kent England |
Suthern beloved one, Wow oh Wow that is beautiful you’ve managed to evoke the dreamy quality, the yearning and the essence of long distance love. Do I love it, YES I DO. Oh my now that is utterly lovely. I only popped in to rest my eyes on beauty, and see what a beauty I found. Sensational writing from a sensational poet. as always Mushy x x x x x x x Tomorrow is another day I don't know what it holds but I can face the future with courage brave and bold Footprints In My Heart Kethry |
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suthern![]() ![]()
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
luminosity: You dear. *S* Thank you so much for your reading, remembering and remarkable response! *S* Toerag: ROFLMAO!!! I swear I don't know if I want to claim kinship to someone who'd turn you away! LOL The nerve!!! That's just not right! LOL Let's try that again... those clothes should be dirty again soon? LOL Marsha: It would be wonderful to see your name around here even if you weren't so complimentary! LOL As it is... I'm beaming! LOL Thank you!! |
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jwesley Member Rara Avis
since 2000-04-30
Posts 7563Spring, Texas |
When one has to reply behind the words of so many others, it's hard to not repeat EVERYTHING said before ... but I know the poet, though it be in print only, and she, I believe, knows it is with my heart I say - I love this piece. j. |
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suthern![]() ![]()
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
j- She does know... and her heart is smiling. *S* Thank you very much!!! |
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miscellanea Member Elite
since 2004-06-24
Posts 4060OH |
Absolutel beautiful, suthern! Yep! It seems to flow so effortlessly and is one easy to relate to.... Much enjoyed! Miscellanea |
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suthern![]() ![]()
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
misc: Thank you so much, sweet lady! I'm glad you enjoyed! *S* |
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