Ode to Poetic Forms - pipTalk Forums

How to Join	Member's Area	Private Library	Search	Sanctuary		Login
Main Forums	Discussion	Tech Talk	Mature Content	Archives	A home without a wall, Our haven without ends, A circle we all call Our Family of Friends!

Marc-Andre
Senior Member

since 2008-12-07

Posts 501

0 posted 2008-12-22 03:19 PM

So soft and pure the pleasure of a verse
When meter moves in concert with our hearts;
The stammering free verse is most perverse
With lines that pelt our minds in jolts and starts.
On hearses and in hymnals rhythm rules
For metered beats won’t fail to soothe the soul,
From ancient times we’ve written songs in rhyme:
They’ve entertained us all, from kings to fools,
And they’ve afforded countless brains to stroll
Authentic worlds or dreams, and all sublime.

So many nights deprived of sleep to craft
Adroit alliterations and true rhymes;
So many days spent on a single draft,
And weeks of observations and of mimes
Thereof, to capture all those studied themes
Obsessing me and urging me to write
In forms I deem my thoughts and moods deserved:
The dignity of soul free verse blasphemes.
Of sonnets and of odes I’ll be white knight
However oft I find myself unnerved.

Oh what a frolic when free of prolix
And never-ending lines of roving thought;
A single truth empowered to transfix
And such a pride to write my feelings wrought:
In mastered craft true art reveals itself.
Rich words the search for rhymes let me explore
To meet criteria that have stood time;
And better still I get to know myself
More intimately than I have before:
To cheat myself of such would be a crime.

Balladeer

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-05

Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA

1 posted 2008-12-22 11:52 PM

Fantastic write, Marc-Andre. You have written a perfect iambic poem, with flawless meter....almost. Only one line blemishes it

Oh what a frolic when free of prolix

work that out and you have a thing of beauty

YoungatHeart2
Member

since 2008-12-12

Posts 81

2 posted 2008-12-23 12:08 PM

wow!!!!!!!!!!!
how many nights did you stay up for that one?

Marc-Andre
Senior Member

since 2008-12-07

Posts 501

3 posted 2008-12-23 12:36 PM

Thanks, Balladeer. I must say that I like the anapestic substitutions in that single line to highlight the frolics...No such effect?

Likewise, I wanted to rhyme "verse" with "perverse" to highlight the perversity. I've poured quite some effort in sounds: alliteration, assonance, and careful choice of consonants for softness or harshness etc. For examples, the soft P's and S's of the first line; the fourth line of the first stanza is the only one in that stanza (and the whole ode) written entirely with monosyllabic words, to highlight "the jolts and starts," the stammering nature of free verse. Yep, that was all planned. Anyone's feedback on that would be greatly appreciated: What worked? And what didn't?

Balladeer, I'll make it a goal to pen one metrical substitution that you will find enhances rather than diminishes a poem. Yep, I like a good challenge

Back to the ode, how about this?

Oh what a frolic once I've shooed prolix
And never-ending lines of roving thought

ethome
Member Patricius

since 2000-05-14

Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada

4 posted 2008-12-23 12:47 PM

Wow! What a wonderful summary and such fine writing.

Eric

Marc-Andre
Senior Member

since 2008-12-07

Posts 501

5 posted 2008-12-23 01:04 AM

Thanks for reading, Eric and YoungatHeart2. To answer your question: on that ode, one night; on poetry, every night

Night is when I write. As I start work in the afternoon, this is not too disruptive for me. To write creatively, I need to know I've got a block of time free of interruptions, such as a phone call, the need to look at the clock because I need to shower and go to work etc. During the day, I read. In the evening, I muse, review, play or listen to music, read the BBC news or watch a documentary or play on youtube: that's the research and creative-mood building part. [Yesterday, I read Keats' odes and watched Greek ode performances. This week, I had read Runes and Ode to Free Verse on this forum.] Around midnight, once I've bid my girlfriend goodnight, I start to write.

I now write everyday, whether I am inspired or not. The Bible is never too far, for inspiring stories. I write on average two to three hours a day. Another passion besides poetry is drama (written in blank verse, such as the plays of Shakespeare), and I'm just starting on that too. I also try to write prose. I would write more, but like most of us here, I need a full-time job.

Care to vote?

Oh what a frolic when free of prolix
OR
Oh what a frolic once I've shooed prolix
And never-ending lines of roving thought

A merry Christmas to you

Mark

ethome
Member Patricius

since 2000-05-14

Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada

6 posted 2008-12-23 06:38 AM

The line flows so well it would be hard to replace it.....JMHO all the same...

Eric

Marc-Andre
Senior Member

since 2008-12-07

Posts 501

7 posted 2008-12-23 06:46 AM

Eric, many thanks for responding

Mark

	⇧ top of page ⇧
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.