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Open Poetry #38

Clash

ecrivan
Member Elite

since 2001-12-10

Posts 3923
my own state

0 posted 2006-08-10 06:25 PM

Suspected clash
on suspended bridges
highly arched
armoured
in good and bad visors
until the fight begins
forces face off
until next battles
wage in decades...

Struggles don't need time
Unsuspected tie
creates humanity
in the middle
between two armies
in metal jackets
where light faces dark
no tommorrow
without conflict
contrasted opposites
on high bridges
where modern man
lives in the middle
as doves wait to land
where hooked beaks fly.

those forces meet
man in the middle
each one has an ear
after countless
enemy deaths
of their same kind
only contrasted,
fill his head
eternal conflicts
duotone opposites
find terrain
the rain washes away
dirt from lustrous visors
on high
the better to see
where civilized are
supposed to be.

Interloper

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-11-06

Posts 8369
Deep in the heart

1 posted 2006-08-14 11:38 AM

I think you straddled the fence very well. I would have liked to see your thoughts fleshed out just a little more. That said, I enjoyed the read

ecrivan
Member Elite

since 2001-12-10

Posts 3923
my own state

2 posted 2006-08-14 11:44 AM

I too like to elaborate at times but am aware of a fine balance about not saying too much or rather not be too descriptive

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