A Cry For The Homeless - pipTalk Forums

How to Join	Member's Area	Private Library	Search	Sanctuary		Login
Main Forums	Discussion	Tech Talk	Mature Content	Archives	A home without a wall, Our haven without ends, A circle we all call Our Family of Friends!

jody5
Senior Member

since 2005-12-21

Posts 876
California, U.S.A.

0 posted 2006-02-25 03:26 PM

Far among the Northern shores
I spied a seal afloat.
A buoy full of seals alike
From the pier I could see.
Homeless like some veterans.
Condominiums built for the wealthy
Taking over our shores, it's beauty.
Cement walls, like jails
full of vietnam vets
who couldn't adjust to the terror
awaiting their return.
Homeless seals, Homeless vet's
Lord help them all to see.

smithdr
Junior Member

since 2006-02-25

Posts 26

1 posted 2006-02-25 03:35 PM

There are some interesting images here.

I find some the ideas jump, but with a little work this could be a great poem.

Thanks for the read.

David

Enchantress
Member Empyrean

since 2001-08-14

Posts 35113
Canada eh.

2 posted 2006-02-25 03:43 PM

Very much enjoyed!!

Well done!
Hugs~Nancy

~ Trace my body with your words,
in doing so, you touch my heart ~

Midnitesun

Member Empyrean

since 2001-05-18

Posts 28647
Gaia

3 posted 2006-02-25 03:55 PM

A sad but good write. I pictured a flotilla of misplaced seals, blanketing the harbor, making all the strange sounds harbor seals make.
And it's ironic, that a special group of Navy veterans are the SEALS. I knew two in Alaska. One was homeless, and AK is an inhospitable place to be without solid shelter and support.
Your write reminded me of the circumstances of his death one winter night.

jody5
Senior Member

since 2005-12-21

Posts 876
California, U.S.A.

4 posted 2006-02-25 04:19 PM

smithdr:  Thank you for your constructive criticism.  It just came out that way from my heart.  Nancy: Thank you for your posative feedback.  I'm glad you liked it. I love your poetry.  Midnitesun:  It was a sad
write.  I was trying to show people what they are doing to the seals.  And the Vet's that came back from the war.  They were not welcomed and they were drafted into that war.
many can't adjust to life and turned to drugs
The jails are full of these vet's that served their country and need help for their
mental health.  I know this because I go to the VA.  I am a Vet. I don't think people know this. I have talked to some of them and it's tragic.  So all I can do is pray and make people aware.

aujussy wolf

Senior Member

since 2003-08-09

Posts 1215
Michigan

5 posted 2006-02-25 05:58 PM

I like the way you think J5 ... very cool outlook . ... liked this write too , i hold high respect to the vets , and the homeless also <3 nice work !

In his mantle gray he walked one day across a shining floor and with crystal key in secrecy he opened an ivory door -J.R.R. Tolkien(T.Bombadil-the adv

Mysteria

Member Laureate

since 2001-03-07

Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada

6 posted 2006-02-26 10:31 PM

A good read and thank you for remembering them all, they are all too soon forgotten by most, and it is a sad situation.

	⇧ top of page ⇧
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.