Open Poetry #36 |
No Slumber in the Violent City |
Marshalzu
since 2001-02-15
Posts 2681Lurking |
No slumber in the violent city Blue flashes light the sky, Blue flashes light the sky, Illuminating blue in the night, Illuminating blue in the night, The sky flashes in the night, Illuminating bright blue light, The quiet of the train The quiet of the train A midnight stillness violently disturbed A midnight stillness violently disturbed The stillness of a midnight train Violently the quiet disturbed Electric buzz in the empty night air Electric buzz in the empty night air Artificial light and the sense of despair Artificial light and the sense of despair The artificial air and electric light The buzz of despair in the empty night The artificial stillness disturbed, Violently in the quiet midnight air Bright electric flashes in the night, Light illuminating the sky. The empty despair of the night And the buzz of a light blue train. |
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© Copyright 2005 Andrew Sewell - All Rights Reserved | |||
SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
I think it's awesome how you do these...I don't think I have the patience for this!! LOL I liked this one a lot "The quiet of the train The quiet of the train A midnight stillness violently disturbed A midnight stillness violently disturbed The stillness of a midnight train Violently the quiet disturbed" |
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iliana Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434USA |
Terrific write....poignant! |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
I like it! |
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Marshalzu
since 2001-02-15
Posts 2681Lurking |
You are really too kind, they are not really that hard to write, though I admit that I am not really happy with the way this one turned out. |
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