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navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #36 » Crushing with Empty
Open Poetry #36
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Obsidian Snow
Member
since 2005-08-24
Posts 88
0 posted 2005-09-15 11:21 AM


Daunting
This my life
That seems so haunting

At times it seems an impossibility
A tangled web of what I thought would be
I need to rest
It’s but another test
I, no longer able to resist

Little drops of salt
Burning a trail of
“what the hell”
down my cheek
trying to offer not but defeat

you could have been more discreet

once ardent eyes
unspoken lies
new only lasts so long
I no longer belong
© Copyright 2005 Carol S. - All Rights Reserved
Dark Stranger
Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631
West Coast
1 posted 2005-09-15 11:30 AM

new is always new again
the next day
when another sun looks down

take a deep breath
and look up
smile at the morning

enjoyed your art here Ob Snow
Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
2 posted 2005-09-15 11:33 AM

Obsidian  
Good write enjoyed the read.
Startime55
Member Elite
since 2003-04-05
Posts 2148
Alberta, Canada
3 posted 2005-09-15 11:52 AM

A vision that haunts the soul....very well done...**big hugs**
Gentle Spirit
Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989
4 posted 2005-09-15 01:10 PM

hauntingly painful write from your soul OS,
and I am reminded of the words
"the only thing that stays the same is everything changes"
Thankfully sometimes, change is a good thing.
Feeling your words here....

live for today,
dream of the future,
and learn eternal truths from the past..
soul drifter
Senior Member
since 2004-09-08
Posts 711
Colorado
5 posted 2005-09-15 01:38 PM

Great write, very lovely. Many a line that I love.

"The moon ain't romantic, it's intimidating as hell". -- Tom Waits, 'Bad Live and a Broken Heart'
Kevin1999
Junior Member
since 2005-05-10
Posts 14
WV
6 posted 2005-09-15 02:02 PM

I feel the emptiness and pain.  Heartfelt.
Cloud 9
Senior Member
since 2004-11-05
Posts 980
Ca
7 posted 2005-09-15 04:04 PM

I can relate to this more than you know.


Perfect.
iliana
Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434
USA
8 posted 2005-09-30 10:47 AM

Good write...like the title, too.
Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
9 posted 2005-09-30 10:49 AM

Excellent write...much enjoyed.
Hugs~Nancy

~Autumn, the year's last, loveliest smile.~
Greeneyes
Deputy Moderator 50 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903
In Your Poetic Mind
10 posted 2005-09-30 11:32 AM


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