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Open Poetry #36
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Archie and the Dyke (or, My Take on "The Little Dutch Boy")
| Open Poetry #36 |
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Archie and the Dyke (or, My Take on "The Little Dutch Boy") |
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iliana Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434USA 
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First draft ... one I will rework at a later date most probably. The Dyke was leaking, breaking down, waters flooding wet the ground. A babbling brook, that's what you found so you placed your finger so sealing up the hole. Keeping your finger on me we found some serenity. But you let your defenses down once and the space between us freed, removed the sweet containment, and your power holding me. My words gushed, a wild, turbulent sea, loquaciousness, undammed, unbridled me. And then you yelled, “S T I F L E Y O U R S E L F , Edith!” "I'm going to drown!" Of course, I frowned, knowing all the while you had your reasons for putting restraint on me. The wall was your safety net -- your way of remaining free, your way of conserving resources, and spending less, not indifference -- in an oddly way, your temperance. So, naturally, the leak had to be plugged. *** Thinking back on that "sit-com," memories are emotions strong. Yet somewhere under gruff and bite I felt your love, old-fashioned kind, that stuck like glue through wrong and right, that plugged the leak that saved the Dyke. Oh, those were the days, when once you reached up with your hand to plug your finger in the dam. You saved us both from bitter end and hushed my rushing soul. For that one moment, we were the whole. [This message has been edited by iliana (08-15-2005 09:58 PM).] |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Man, does this one ping-pong me around... It was so nice later in life to find out he had a heart!  Good one, SIL |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
iliana Good write, enjoyed the read. |
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Marge Tindal 
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Jo~ What an adorable 'thinker' this morn~ *Huglets*  ~*Marge*~ ~*When the heart grieves over what it has lost, |
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LeeJ Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296 |
Illana, this served well, many emotions, lined with an under lying look back into what once was...humor and a positive outlook, warms the face of this one...enjoyed. |
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miscellanea Member Elite
since 2004-06-24
Posts 4060OH |
Lots of thought and wit went into the creation of this. Very clever and nostalgic, Jo! Love this write! miscellanea |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
Lily jo, your imagination, wit, and creativity went into over-drive with this whirlwind of a write! I think I'll head back for a second read in case I missed something! lol You've just shown that a "hole" can be a "whole"! ~ at least I think you have!  You're a pet, my friend and you endear yourself to your readers with every write!  Loving you, Linda |
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Startime55 Member Elite
since 2003-04-05
Posts 2148Alberta, Canada |
I think I'll do what Earth Angel did and go back for another read....Your words bring a very interesting vision to life...Wonderful writing that captivates your reader....*big hugs* |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
 enjoyed! |
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iliana Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434USA |
I did not know how many would get the analogies in this one with Archie and Edith, but I figured people my general age would (if they watched TV in the US anyway)... and then I mentioned "The Little Boy and the Dyke" to my 25-year-old and she didn't know the story....couldn't believe it...thought for sure I had told her that one. LOL Thank you all for your posts and for taking the time to read this. .....jo |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
Not fair. When you had questions 'bout my poem--you phoned me. *pout*  and I'll tell ya why I'm grinning when I talk to you!  |
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iliana Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434USA |
Karen, thanks..........for the chat, too! |
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Professor Gloom Member Elite
since 2000-07-23
Posts 3082of Depression |
And interesting poem. Although I don’t think Archie would like Being associated with a Dyke. And he wasn’t a free flowing thinker either. Still this shows that differences make unions possible Not just similarities. He had the chair to be comfortable in, Even if he sat outside societies views. Gloom |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Joe...this is wonderful! The humor and the sensitivity as you look back at life. Very well done!! |
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iliana Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434USA |
Gandolf.....you are too funny!! No, he probably wouldn't have remembered the story about the little boy and the dyke and would have interpreted the word the wrong way and then all He__ would have broken loose. No, I don't think he was a free thinker either...but he did like being free....especially down at the old tavern with the "boys," as I recall. This was an experiment mostly, combining two thoughts that came to me simultaneously, when someone close to me recently said, "Stifle yourself, Edith." There are times, babble should be stifled, yes, there are some times. And you, sir, know I can babble....lol! Good to hear from you, friend. ......jo |
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iliana Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434USA |
Martie, thanks for your sweet comment! Glad you liked it. Somewhat of a challenge to get my meanings through, but I think most got it. .....jo (no e please....lol) |
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Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
"My words gushed, a wild, turbulent sea, loquaciousness, undammed, unbridled me." ROTFL! I am laughing so hard at this part, I can't finish reading the rest of this! I'll be back...  |
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garysgirl
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
It's good to read you again, Jo. I missed you. Hugs, MY LINKS Ethel's Love Poetry Ethel's Heart Poems Ethel's Always List My SpiritIsUp Poetry Shelf Ethel's Creations |
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Honeybunch Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-29
Posts 7115South Africa |
This is fantastic! I hope you don't re-work it because you might dam up the flow that takes readers exactly where they're meant to go. |
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iliana Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434USA |
I didn't know if you would be familiar with Archie & Edith, Helen. Do you get that in S.Africa? Or did you live here for awhile? Thanks for your encouragement. If I rework it...it will on be for the cadence, a little...don't know if I will now or not...lol Well, I think I will try to turn in early tonight and see what happens. After reading that really wonderful poem you just posted, it does make me what to dream Stage I. .......jo |
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nakdthoughts Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200Between the Lines |
Yet somewhere under gruff and bite yes...I know several like this~~~ and I do miss that show *s M |
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iliana Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434USA |
Maureen -- funny isn't it how sometimes those walls actually do make things work? 'Course, sometimes they don't. Thanks for stopping by. ......jo |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
You made my day! The Bunkers were my favorite family and t.v. show. I still watch the reruns on Primetime, along with Golden Girls. Dating myself but it was worth it, as was reading this poem a couple of times.  |
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iliana Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434USA |
Sharon, didn't really think about it until after I wrote this, but I think that one TV series is worth a poem all of its own....you know, it changed television forever -- real history there. Guess I dated myself, too...lol. I love the Golden Girls, too. Someone ought to do a write about them....hehehe (hint, hint)! ....jo |
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