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Open Poetry #35
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clicking needles one
| Open Poetry #35 |
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clicking needles one |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738
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"You know," she said, and she sat nervous, hands in twitch of twine of yarn-- as if she had some more to say I don't believe I'd seen that done-- the balling up of life undone and like the literature I'd grazed just like the movies she portrayed she sat and rolled herself apart-- and licked the frays of lingered heart, of fingers splayed the dancing of the moments of the lathe: "I thought--" she lied - a hesitate: "I knew.." she sighed. I knew. I ate the note she wrote to me that said an instant of the grace in full of down toward my lap and guessed "I couldn't" do this blush of breath as if I were a dog that thrushed the birds to fly to their own grave - will you love me anyway? as she shot herself. I worked the knots of yarn let go... spooling reckless in the heap of the plots where we begin the simple fuss of love and this is somehow where it all would end-- She couldn't let him down. I knew. My fingers had just dug the grave. My thoughts were hinges eagering trespass of what is agreed tossing back the deeds of me as if I were a gospel song as if I were like her but strong I fed the strand to nervous plans as she balled up all her life "I wish..." she said in tremor's stand, "I wish that I could knit my life" and curve it like a hardball thrown I moaned and danced the witnessing the word as is my own I gave the spit of knuckles white and prayed and knit a perl times two. * * * ( a repost, edited) [This message has been edited by serenity blaze (02-13-2005 05:14 AM).] |
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| © Copyright 2005 serenity blaze - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Margherita Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236Eternity |
"I couldn't let him down" ... Yes, towards the end, there is the pondering over what can't be changed anymore, wondering what would be if we could begin anew. This is masterfully rendered here, dear Serenity! Love, Margherita |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
Margherita? thank you for your patience as I edited my sins.  yer lovely. |
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Lady Ollyne Member
since 2001-01-08
Posts 337East Coast |
wow, wow, wow..give me some of that Darn it!!!! I forgot who I was last evening  and I am too lazy today to think up a Lady O response...besides I awoke with a pounding of a headache...so it is only normal I have forgotten who I am!  M |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
sighhhh, you move me beyond words m'lady.  mxx and i knew in the crystalline knowledge of you ~Buckingham/Nicks |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
The metaphor of knitting a life, unraveling our mistakes, trying again... I use to knit... one has to be a calm person... otherwise the mistakes are quite obious. Well done! |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
You have a rare and special gift that is expressed through your uniquely creative and thought-provoking poetry. I can honestly say that I usually read a poem of yours at least twice to savor and appreciate the several layers that you so brilliantly interweave. EA |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
wow Linda. I cherish all who take the time to read and reply to my madness, but that is one special reply. Thank you, m'friend.  A little moth told me that Valentine poetry makes her a tad cranky sometimes, so I was trying to put something else on the board here. My muse wasn't kicking in, so I reworked this one, and naturally, once I got started I couldn't stop.  Thank you all for reading.  |
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iliana Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434USA |
When we realize the commonalities we have with others and the examples set, then make our own choices to be stronger....that is a gift of compassion, not only to the one we were thinking of but to ourselves, I think. This thought provoking poem made me think of my neighbor when I was growing up...who could not rewind the ball of yarn or knit it into anything....she reached the place where choices are made. I witnessed the outcome of her choice upon her children. All I can say is that I think "regrouping" and trying to knit it back together is the best we can do. Love you, lady, and this very sensitive piece of knitting...........jo |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
jo-jo? You found the thread I was trying weave through this. I wrote with a friend in mind. I lost her to suicide over two decades ago. I like to think that somewhere, somehow, she knows she is not forgotten. thank you |
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iliana Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434USA |
you are very much more that welcome, you know. My neighbor did the same. I really do understand. Love, you |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
She does, honey, she knows. |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Hard to know what to say sometimes, ya know? |
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*Alli4000*
since 2004-03-21
Posts 3188The World of Poetry |
~Alli~ *AIM = Alli4000* Journal! |
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Alicia Member
since 2002-03-22
Posts 279 |
i've been open to your poem for such a long time k. here with it on the screen, and rereading. and thinking and reading again. it's had me. it has. 'as if I were like her but strong',... it strikes and stirs me. |
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ThisDiamond Member Rara Avis
since 2002-02-22
Posts 9353Michigan, USA |
What a valentine this is Karen... For real! Unique, self evident, warm and disarming. Pure. TD |
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littlewing Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655New York |
K, *laughing* because I posted something before I read this . . . random acts of kindness . . . that is what you are . . . and do. Stop fretting. *smile* |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
I put off reading this one something just said I wasn't ready yet that's all I'll say right now |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
serenity, I wish I may, I wish I might Change the colors of white light Or walk each brilliant shade of hew And weave a shawl just for you |
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