»
Archives
»
Open Poetry #35
»
out of abandon
| Open Poetry #35 |
|
out of abandon |
|
|
Alicia Member
since 2002-03-22
Posts 279
|
we will quiet ourselves discretely we will kneel and fall against each other and imagine the winter when we were half alive we will remember the evening light and how it beat clean against the arms of the skeletal trees and against the buildings still carved out sharply we will remember the sky glowing and how it sighed a bluish fuss like you, coo coo and we will imagine too// that it is sunday or another day and that we both have something to say and that we are holding hands and saying it together when really, we are two old birds in a street in a city under wires- under water wet we are/ flushing our frail bodies with the holy water, with the history we are choking on the fresh sprigs and tangling our sore wings in the rebirth that is not ours, we are carving our promises into our poor pale legs and bleeding our last words silently we are// for dying our small pebble hearts by the back door closing by the small garden sprouting spring- not in the street not with the water or washing not with the fierce light stabbing us blind |
||
| © Copyright 2005 Alicia - All Rights Reserved | |||
|
Susan Member Ascendant
since 2004-03-27
Posts 5104walking the surreal |
this leaves me speechless - what a superb job you've done here - Susan If I wander far enough, long enough, will I finally know . . . |
||
|
passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
that last verse tops it off nicely very nice |
||
|
Sadelite Member Elite
since 2003-10-11
Posts 2519 |
You write with a lot of feeling. I enjoyed reading your poem, but was saddened. Hoping better days ahead. ~sadie |
||
|
Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Alicia I'm always amazed by you....such a heart you explore and allow us to see...thank you!  |
||
|
Huan Yi Member Ascendant
since 2004-10-12
Posts 6688Waukegan |
Alicia, There is a certain distraction in your poems that I like. This one reminded me of Mark Strand for whose poetry I have great regard. I really think you are capable of being published. John |
||
|
EagleOne Member Elite
since 2000-03-07
Posts 2829Between a laugh and a tear... |
Your writing never fails to move me. Always enjoy your thoughts,take care! "A spring shower was cause to run Until you twirled me in the rain" ~ BDC [This message has been edited by EagleOne (03-07-2005 04:03 AM).] |
||
|
Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
Oh sighhh A, I can't express enough just how good it feels to read your words. amazing you are of course this goes into my library. Mxx  and i knew in the crystalline knowledge of you |
||
Mysteria 
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
The day your book is published I want one! I am NEVER dissapointed when I read your thoughts. Incredible work. What's past is prologue. |
||
|
MGROVES
since 2004-02-01
Posts 3802california |
awesome My spirit will rise |
||
|
Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
we will quiet ourselves discretely we will kneel and fall against each other and imagine the winter when we were half alive we will remember the evening light and how it beat clean against the arms of the skeletal trees and against the buildings still carved out sharply we will remember the sky glowing and how it sighed a bluish fuss like you, coo coo ========================================= As always I learn from reading you... so unique...so distinct... good to find you here....hope life is treating you kind poetess A.  one drop, an ocean ... one seed, the forest ... one leaf, the wind ... |
||
|
JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
NIce writing...James |
||
|
Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
"and we will imagine too// that it is sunday or another day and that we both have something to say and that we are holding hands and saying it together" So much of life is wrapped up in this handful of words... Alicia, I never tire watching the unfolding of your mind moments. |
||
|
serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
I don't miss a thing you post, m'friend. I wanted you to know that. You always leave me wishing I could channel you. |
||
|
muted
since 2004-01-15
Posts 2949Elapsing, Eclipsing, Evolving |
with a touch of morbid, beautiful grit... beauty without shine. this is awesome, the descriptions do "carve" images into cold stone, yet there is warmth too. very nice |
||
|
Aenimal Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-18
Posts 7350the ass-end of space |
we are choking on the fresh sprigs and tangling our sore wings in the rebirth that is not ours, we are carving our promises into our poor pale legs and bleeding our last words silently you broke me with this. but i needed it, cleansing. staring in awe at your words, red-eyed and greatful. r |
||
|
LeeJ Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296 |
we are choking on the fresh sprigs and tangling our sore wings in the rebirth that is not ours, we are carving our promises into our poor pale legs and bleeding our last words silently reading this was like watching Sense and Sensibility, when she saw him with another....Your writing is undescribably passionate |
||
|
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Alicia, so good to read your poetry again...it's been awhile. I think the majority of us believe you should be published...so have you been sending your work out? I hope so...I'll be one of the first in line! |
||
vandana
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463USA |
good read |
||
|
Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296Purgatorial Incarceration |
this is so cool, so melancholy, so personal - not that all your other works don't feel that way. I love "bluish fuss", though i have to admit that the coo-coo seemed a bit too lighthearted for the tone of the whole. all told - too cool. egowhores.com - really love yourself. |
||
|
Alicia Member
since 2002-03-22
Posts 279 |
ah golly. thanks all for finding me, reading this...for your often too generous comments. and yes, that coo bit seemed a tad wacky to me, but it wanted to be there so... thanks for reading, i'm reading too. |
||
|
wandering glider Senior Member
since 2001-04-04
Posts 501aloft |
mmmmmm nice trip thanks for the ride glider |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
