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Open Poetry #35

bay of misconception

Dark Stranger
Member Patricius

since 2001-03-19

Posts 13631
West Coast

0 posted 2005-06-02 06:29 AM

it was the silken hound
that clawed the door
leaving ribbons
of loud
where the eyes had been
folded hands

she runs wild now
with her skin behind
like a jacket
when summer dances
and forgetful is the song
noted by note

I wonder of her eyes
do they see the cellophane
of her languid
as it paints the sky
over dot to dot stars
and when comes the dawn

will she just look like more water

_____________
dark

~K~
Member

since 2004-07-27

Posts 148

1 posted 2005-06-02 07:38 AM

I love this. It reads like a lucid voyage.

Gentle Spirit
Member Patricius

since 2000-10-09

Posts 13989

2 posted 2005-06-02 08:10 AM

wow D, this is one of your best evers..
indeed, what will she look like come the morning when the light reflects upon her...

This is one of your more remarkable writes babe. Good morning California!

I really want to care,
I want to feel something,
let me dig a little deeper
nah, still nothing~
my give a DAMN is busted. Jodee

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

3 posted 2005-06-02 08:14 AM

...she runs wild now
...when summer dances...

you left behind
some visual glory
as you sailed away
on her tresses...

good morning, DS...

Dark Stranger
Member Patricius

since 2001-03-19

Posts 13631
West Coast

4 posted 2005-06-02 09:50 AM

thank you ladies
for the eyes here

D

LeeJ
Member Patricius

since 2003-06-19

Posts 13296

5 posted 2005-06-02 03:18 PM

sigh

babygirlwlove
Senior Member

since 2004-10-10

Posts 1180
New York City

6 posted 2005-06-03 07:26 AM

and forgetful is the song
noted by note

hell yes. that's niiiice~

**babygirL**

**Intoxicant to the SouL**

Martie

Moderator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-09-21

Posts 28049
California

7 posted 2005-06-03 10:25 AM

DS

"I wonder of her eyes
do they see the cellophane
of her languid
as it paints the sky
over dot to dot stars
and when comes the dawn

will she just look like more water"

If you paint her with your words, she will be gorgeous!

Cloud 9
Senior Member

since 2004-11-05

Posts 980
Ca

8 posted 2005-06-03 04:03 PM

Excellent as always.

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