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Open Poetry #35
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what are poems? (in four cliche lines)
| Open Poetry #35 |
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what are poems? (in four cliche lines) |
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netsky Member
since 2005-03-29
Posts 148Miami 
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an attempt to rise above cliche while employing purely cliche words and phrases Dreams, these are in the thin air Forever, bubbles never last A'bursting here, a'blowing there A need to remake what is past |
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| © Copyright 2005 Reid Welch - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Sadelite Member Elite
since 2003-10-11
Posts 2519 |
as cute as a button and as true as blue! Enjoyed the clever cliche fun. Incidently, welcome to Passions! sadie |
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netsky Member
since 2005-03-29
Posts 148Miami |
thank you.. I hang out mostly at critical. I like -insults- (grin) but don't we all want reality checks? no! poetry bubblers, every one of us. I confess: i'm a gushy mushy guy and I'm gonna make a t'erse in thanks to you. And I'll pink up some sweet poems of others around this general board. thanks.. your t'erse will go into the t'erse pileup presently located at critical. cheers, reid |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Aha! I thoroughly enjoyed this one!! Smiles & Hugs, Nancy~ For it was not into my ear you whispered |
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nakdthoughts Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200Between the Lines |
you are a breath of fresh air~~enjoying you M |
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netsky Member
since 2005-03-29
Posts 148Miami |
old old observation; is not from my pen: dining patron: "Waiter! There's a fly in my soup" waiter: "Don't yell and shout and wave it about or the rest will be wanting one too"  thank you, kind keepers, for your honey that draws me out and into soups |
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netsky Member
since 2005-03-29
Posts 148Miami |
now, I just ran up this fluff at some other, more critical board. We must expect our poems to plop esp. when some see them as glop. Mine tend to glop, sort of...definitely! ---- quote: ------ we distill: Bubbles bustin' here Forever a need to blow  |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Nice...James |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Dang...we're pretty much fresh out of insults... but in CA, you WILL get some honest critiques, to the best of the responder's ability...  I saw this poem earlier, and I liked the spirited HOPE that the bubble encased...even knowing that the burst would come... still, the shimmer on the rim would be there, if only for a blink. Well done, Sir. |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
If you're looking for a cliche' abuser, look no farther. *S* I'm guilty... and completely unrepentant! LOL |
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Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
Somewhere over the rainbow, art imitates life. What the dickens? In a nutshell, I am the salt of the earth, though a horse of a different color. Read my lips! I am a bleeding heart, an armchair quarterback full of freudian slips, on the road to hell (which) is paved with good intentions. I leave no stone unturned till the fat lady sings. LO, so many flavorful cliches, but no thyme to rhyme! (OOPS! I went WAY OVER my assigned four lines!) |
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netsky Member
since 2005-03-29
Posts 148Miami |
delightful, midnight! What I see: we who may -wallow- our poems on this side in cliche, on occasion....well, these are the same folks who can see -beyond cliche- and -sense- the deeper message behind -seeming cliche- On other boards we are more likely to see discriminating readers (that's a good way to be, of course) get stopped -cold- by the cliche and .. into critical thinking mode they go! They may miss the poem entirely. My critic I transplanted above said "lose some words" because why? To say -something, anything?- ha ha... you know that you connect when your poem -pleases yourself- YOU are the most important reader of your works. You are -why- you -should be your own favorite poet-. If you don't willingly agree, I posit this: why bother? Almost any poem of "general nature" has already been written by famed poets of the past. Why waste our time trying to better what may already be easily found? my answer: Because you write to buzz and pleasure your own brain. This is creative ego at its best. Plus, your works may give pleasure to some few others, who are attuned to the same -impotent plane from which you work- and here, this way, comes your greater pleasure: Someone read this and someone got excited enough to make a reply or a new poem. And someone besides -me- was made a bit happier than they were an hour or day before. so it spreads. "HEART", is disallowed! FORBIDDEN at "PFFA". CLICHE!! but friends, it's all about 'heart' after all. Dismiss the "PFFA" crowd for narrow thinking. I do. |
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longte Member
since 2005-04-06
Posts 199Australia |
Very Very new here But thats one of the first poems here that is how I believe poetry is All About Shall we take a moment to reflect and think of who we are Over a thousand years ago I think they called us bards And we would walk from town to town to help to spread the news We'd talk of war and peace and love, and sometimes our own views Some were good Some were bad Some were quite absurd But when we reached the village... all came to hear the words There’d be celebration.. Joy and feasting in the town For we had travelled widely.. and spread the news around We would try to talk in rhyme to keep them all amused Sometimes they laughed..Sometimes they cried ..sometimes we were abused We were there to question Kings.. And talk of love and hate We searched the earth for answers ... before it was too late Thats the history of the path, that we are all now on Much has changed ...Much is new... But poetry goes on Now we play in cyberspace, and on the internet But nothings really changed.. there are no answers yet From an older guy whos a very young poet |
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LeeJ Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296 |
Welcome to PIP...and Reid...enjoyed not only your poem, but also, the commentarys that followed...I believe you'll find a very intellectual sext here, that is both imformative and unusually kind & considerate...PIP, is the most comfortable and best poetry web sights I've experienced, and feel very blessed in that fact. There are a lot of talented people here to boot, and I've learned alot. The forums are especially interesting.... I believe poetry is indeed, as you say, adding....should also be a terrific experience, which opens many doors for each individual. You wrote this... and here, this way, comes your greater pleasure: Someone read this and someone got excited enough to make a reply or a new poem. And someone besides -me- was made a bit happier than they were an hour or day before. Well done and said...looking forward to reading more of you. Lee J. |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
I enjoyed this whole thread |
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