Open Poetry #34 |
Termite Queen |
Ratleader
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass |
Termite Queen She was a queen then, all new in the darkness, pampered by slaves. Now she would be something else, a shapeless gut sack at the end of a wooden hole. I wonder, does she remember that once she had wings, her sisters all a shiny blur rising out of a crack into the shocking light? Can she see them now, the hive scent sharp as they swarmed up from the moist blackness together? She couldn’t return now, grown huge with her thousands and her eggs, but does she recall the feel of lifting through the giddy air, treasure a memory of sun spokes that lanced a wheel of clouds, while the one time joy of green and blue flooded in through multifacet eyes? Does she glory in absent reflection on the song of her own slick chitin resonating to the beat of those translucent wings, the glory of her only time alone when for a moment the world had volume and shape, and the passionate weight of choosing before the wings were gone as she chewed herself down into a new darkness? Is there bliss in it? Does she remember at all? I do. |
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© Copyright 2004 Ed Ratledge - All Rights Reserved | |||
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
You manage to get into anyone's mind...let alone anything...else... Well done, Sir. You make us look all around! |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
but does she recall the feel of lifting through the giddy air, treasure a memory of sun spokes that lanced a wheel of clouds, while the one time joy of green and blue flooded in through multifacet eyes? Does she glory in absent reflection on the song of her own slick chitin resonating to the beat of those translucent wings, the glory of her only time alone when for a moment the world had volume and shape, and the passionate weight of choosing before the wings were gone as she chewed herself down into a new darkness? Considering the title, I never thought I'd be reading words and wishing I could... just once... write like this... On the other hand... considering the poet... I should have. *S* Your vision and clarity are exceeded only by your talent, my friend... This is one that will linger in my mind... and I'll welcome it warmly. *S* |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Ed...it matters not that you are writing about a terminte....this is one of the best poems I've ever read....certainly, one of your best. Afterall, you are writing about a queen! |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
A poetic and royal tribute to a termite! An interesting view through your magnifying eyes! You see what most people miss! EA |
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myheart Member
since 2004-11-05
Posts 160lost in your eyes |
An exceptional write! enjoyed. ~myheart~ |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
I'd have to agree with Martie here, most definitely one of your best. Magnificent! Mxx into this night i wonder, it's morning that i dread, another day of knowing of, the path i fear to tread. |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
I had to come back to this... Your work always makes a lasting impression... and this is indeed one of your best. *S* And yes... I forgot that library thinggie... LOL And don't blame blonde... my attention was captured by excellence. *G* |
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Ericc Member Elite
since 2003-01-31
Posts 4178 |
Great write! Eric |
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Marsha
since 2000-07-10
Posts 7423Maidstone Kent England |
Ed darling man, now this is exceptional writing, you know I rarely find the time to visit these days but just occasionally I slip in to read a few poems, and today I found yours. I must admit that I read it because you wrote it, and not because the title pulled me in. But oh how glad I am that I stopped and read it, because it is superb, I mean really excellent writing. You are always an outstanding writer, but this time you’ve surpassed even yourself this is beyond great. Truly excellent writing, you are one amazing poet and I love your ability to write words that are magical as always Mushy Tomorrow is another day I don't know what it holds |
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Copperbell Senior Member
since 2003-11-08
Posts 956 |
I absolutely love this!! Makes me want to write more, dig deeper. |
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RSWells Member Elite
since 2001-06-17
Posts 2533 |
Great imagery in this fall of aging beauty, decline in grace and/or erosion of respect. |
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WhiteRose Member Elite
since 2002-07-23
Posts 3208somebody's dungeon |
This is splendid. It's filled with deep images that capture so well the scenery, the freedom of the flight. I really enjoyed the read. |
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