The Knot in Me, Monotony (villanelle)

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RSWells
Member Elite

since 2001-06-17

Posts 2533

0 posted 2005-02-01 02:16 PM

In the absence of light………(or dark)

.
.
.
I drink my coffee, and I drink it slow
to wash the dreams I didn’t dream away
and start a day where there’s nowhere to go

I breathe the same-same air, not friend or foe,
my chest may heave a sigh but beats cliché.
I drink my coffee and I drink it slow

I guess I slept, yet wake again as though
time held some promise and a role I’d play
yet start a day where there’s nowhere to go

What passes for a life’s a puppet show,
less strings or audience, a sad ballet.
I drink my coffee and I drink it slow

And on and on in this way does it flow
before a sunless dawn, in mornings gray,
another day where there’s nowhere to go

You, dear reader, pretend you do not know
such void and hopeless feelings in your day.
I drink my coffee and I drink it slow
and start a day where there’s nowhere to go

Poets against the war is redundant

jellybeans
Member Elite

since 2000-10-13

Posts 2298

1 posted 2005-02-01 02:49 PM

wow, I am impressed, I love these form poems, I doubt I could ever write one...and *s* I drink my coffee and I drink it fast, it seems I have everywhere to be before the days end, and then it starts all over again.
wonderful write, it makes one think, and I love poems like that

Alicia
Member

since 2002-03-22

Posts 279

2 posted 2005-02-01 03:58 PM

here.
-----

(and they are. they have been. all along - incredibly so)

Gentle Spirit
Member Patricius

since 2000-10-09

Posts 13989

3 posted 2005-02-01 04:02 PM

I have been known to drink my coffee so slowly that I end up having to reheat it.
Just takes something away from it when I do that though. Wonderful Villanelle Richard.
This is truly one of the forms I find hardest to do.

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

4 posted 2005-02-01 04:04 PM

You executed this piece in such a way
that the reader slows down to take it all in...

and I swear I could smell the coffee beans...

hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius

since 1999-07-05

Posts 10750
Glen Hope, PA USA

5 posted 2005-02-01 07:30 PM

...since you've nowhere to go, pour me a cup and we'll sit and chat a while

Not an easy form to write, but you've done it masterfully

nakdthoughts
Member Laureate

since 2000-10-29

Posts 19200
Between the Lines

6 posted 2005-02-01 07:38 PM

You, dear reader, pretend you do not know
such void and hopeless feelings in your day.
I drink my coffee and I drink it slow
and start a day where there’s nowhere to go

~smiling~...my day begins and ends that way for now~~

love Villanelles

M

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

7 posted 2005-02-02 12:54 PM

sometimes it's a good feeling, having nowhere to go...sometimes it's not.

I say we finish our coffee and go look at sectional sofas!

CastleGuard
Senior Member

since 2003-04-30

Posts 760
Alberta, Canada

8 posted 2005-02-02 01:19 PM

Excellent effort on the villanelle. I, too, like form poetry.

CG

Mysteria

Member Laureate

since 2001-03-07

Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada

9 posted 2005-02-03 06:15 PM

Oh, but I do know - and I drink mine slow with Hazelnut cream

Soulfisher
Member

since 2005-01-07

Posts 226
where ever the fly fishing is good

10 posted 2005-02-03 06:24 PM

bravo richard in form and slow sipping sound you brew a masterpiece for our delight.

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