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Open Poetry #34
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waiting for the straight
| Open Poetry #34 |
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waiting for the straight |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095
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it’s like Pitt Street, sans the horns lifting fringes, lifting skirts madness whirls round these kerbs like subways screeching to a holt i bolt whistle blows a hop-skip and jump as platform thirty 9 smacks me in the face between the changing of my lanes i don’t like these broken lines freedom seems to overtake the wheels turn me against the grain and road rage rants the brain through the eyes of red and green amber lies in wait sick and tired of the in-between waiting for the straight into this night i wonder, it's morning that i dread, another day of knowing of, the path i fear to tread. ~Sarah McLachlan~ [This message has been edited by Dark Angel (01-12-2005 03:45 PM).] |
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| © Copyright 2005 Dark Angel - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Oh, welcome home and thank you for the curves! |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Excellent!! I so much enjoy your work Maree! In the midst of winter, |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
ooooh and wow this had the energy of the visual, and exactly what I look for when I read, the emotion matches the thought and just the concrete visual of the construction sending it all home. I like the verve in this m'lady, veddy veddy mouch... now kiss me! grin  (Just put your lips on mine and say "wow")  Nod. Just like that. awesome you |
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Mysteria 
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
Now that was some ride! You just keep getting better and better - how do you do that? Ah never mind, won't happen in my world Carpe' Diem |
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wranx Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689Moved from a shack to a barn |
Vroooom! Its like Karen said...pent up kinetic energy. |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Hi Maree Sounds like my day today delivering flowers, only have to add a downpoor that you could hardly see through. Loved the feel of this...and the way you played with words. As always, excellent!  |
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Aenimal Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-18
Posts 7350the ass-end of space |
I'm with K, both with regards to the poem and that you should kiss her..send photos |
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*Alli4000*
since 2004-03-21
Posts 3188The World of Poetry |
Great write!  ~Alli~ Happy 2005! |
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jwesley Member Rara Avis
since 2000-04-30
Posts 7563Spring, Texas |
Didn't so much "read" as "feel" this - I mean you can't read with your eyes closed - and it lingers even when closed and hidden from view.... Loved it. Jimmy |
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iliana Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434USA |
"sick and tired of the in-between waiting for the straight" Wow, do I love these lines!  |
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inkedgoddess Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-19
Posts 7392Ohio |
this moves!!!!!!!!! |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
how much I understand this! yes |
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Susan Caldwell Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348Florida |
"i don’t like these broken lines freedom seems to overtake the wheels turn me against the grain and road rage rants the brain" Oh yummy stuff!! Loved that first stanza as well...the in your face exacting of the words! very, very nice work! "cast me gently into the morning, for the night has been unkind" |
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Gentle Spirit Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989 |
You my friend have been greatly missed. I am so glad you are back.  Thank you for gifting us again with your magnificant poetry! |
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muted
since 2004-01-15
Posts 2949Elapsing, Eclipsing, Evolving |
attitude, movement, grit, yes yes |
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Lighthousebob Member Elite
since 2000-06-14
Posts 4725California |
Makes me want to screeeeech tires and get the heck out!!! Your poetry is very very descriptive and for me indulges many intriguing snap shot mind images. Again, enjoyed reading -Bob |
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Margherita Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236Eternity |
through the eyes of red and green amber lies in wait sick and tired of the in-between waiting for the straight Wow! Great write ... your words rock. Love, Margherita |
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SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
"the wheels turn me against the grain and road rage rants the brain through the eyes of red and green amber lies in wait sick and tired of the in-between waiting for the straight" I really enjoy reading you |
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Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia |
Lovely words and as always you string them together with aplomb and daring. BTW I'm coming up from Melbourne only for one day on the day for lovers so do you want to play? The morning sees me busy the afternoon as well - if we could meet for dinner that would just be swell I'm leaving by 8:30 and just so you know I have to be back early there's no time for a show but if you'd like to meet me drop a line or two contact me through email or on this poem will do. Here in the midst of my lonely abyss, a single joy I find...your presence in my mind. Unknown |
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Greeneyes
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903In Your Poetic Mind |
Wow Maree! beauty in each line! ~~*~~ |
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