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Open Poetry #34

me and you in indigo blue

Dark Stranger
Member Patricius

since 2001-03-19

Posts 13631
West Coast

0 posted 2004-11-30 04:36 PM

the metal feeling
in the roof of my mouth
and I have never tasted
a blade
but recognize

how it clings to saliva
like a shadow does the wind
when wings move
and the underside is bare
for some looker's eyes

I dream of you often now
as if you were that foil
and I was gum
laid out flat and firm
folded carefully into you

some god'spert hand
would make the fit better
if he were monkey lucky
and had the time
so much has been spent too

just getting to this place in you
and we never tried or knew
it was where we would end
upside down facing each other
like the photo I sent you

that made your shivers wicked
_______________

dark

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

1 posted 2004-11-30 04:53 PM

Gads...

the thoughts you leave behind...

Enchantress
Member Empyrean

since 2001-08-14

Posts 35113
Canada eh.

2 posted 2004-11-30 04:55 PM

....Damn!!

Cpat Hair

Member Patricius

since 2001-06-05

Posts 11793

3 posted 2004-11-30 04:57 PM

Damn Amigo...
Not sure if the underlying feeling of anger and loss is greater or less than the sum of the desire...

either way...

damn fine writing...

Martie

Moderator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-09-21

Posts 28049
California

4 posted 2004-11-30 06:02 PM

DS

"and we never tried or knew
it was where we would end
upside down facing each other"

Touching to me...the whole poem.

Susan
Member Ascendant

since 2004-03-27

Posts 5104
walking the surreal

5 posted 2004-11-30 07:42 PM

D -

smiling here - at the picture you've drawn - of the whispers spoken like the breeze upon the willow - and all done up in indigo - bleeding into the silver of steel - with mirror shine - and double the reflection- it is a good place to stand and see the return gaze -

Susan

Happiness isn't something that happens to you, it's created from within you. Joy is a state of mind.

Dark Angel
Member Patricius

since 1999-08-04

Posts 10095

6 posted 2004-11-30 09:55 PM

damn fine writing indeed!

totally awesome

placing this carefully into my library

Mxx

into this night i wonder, it's morning that i dread, another day of knowing of, the path i fear to tread.
~Sarah McLachlan~

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