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Open Poetry #33
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My Time in a Bottle
| Open Poetry #33 |
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My Time in a Bottle |
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LeeJ Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296
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The eyes of sun wide open Where you and I began Your summer black hair Pealing back, exposing growth now and then Everything about the love from a woman Bridges, like determined words in armor Providing sustenance for an entire army Like a river meandering downstream… Slow moving water interweaves and turns Coming to a place in the soft pool of change Do you see how slightly lips parted? Touched your forehead? Your weakened knees Submissive, forgetting all about any grocery list Your tenderness embedded in the nap of my neck? Where lengths of arms became nostalgic With imperfection weaving options Learning to listen inside for rose colored fertility And the imminence of our secret flight Yearning for the food of travel You taught me to count the mileage markers along the turnpike To understand their compass Driving all the way across the ocean and bay One on each side of us…like something real, wild and ready You began my transformation, coaxing me back home Trying out recipes we gathered over the last twenty years We were a city that melted into 3-D silence Straying from all the main roads Sailing the seas worth every sea leg of discomfort Adopted by the graffiti of time in our memory Ohhhh, your voice still sings to me from the back lot Happiness suspended my sky, allowing me not time to Remember maelstroms, which were censured with Rarified beauty like the silver blue spray of incoming breakers Both in innocence and wilderness, we had put our desire To music and danced all the way through it Illuminated in agreement, hormonal frenzy of even minds Intimacy…where the sea rose up beneath us and the moon Shone like a smooth nuptial aisle, like some prophecy Where my soul turned proud…fresh born and full of moxie Now my porch is imbalanced and while looking at the moon Alone, trying to keep from falling off I remember the Gulf Stream which clenched my soul The night you left me, knocking at your door I was sore ashamed for loving you that much Leaving the shell of my heart in the memory of a necklace Ironic, the talisman of bad luck Now….I scan the passersby Wishing sometimes, she were me, as I brew coffee for one pretending I knew all along, I wasn't his true north |
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| © Copyright 2004 Lee J. - All Rights Reserved | |||
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JL Member Ascendant
since 2004-04-01
Posts 6128Texas, USA |
“Now….I scan the passersby Wishing sometimes, she were me, as I brew coffee for one pretending I knew all along, I wasn't his true north” Such deep, deep emotions in this write. Held my breath throughout the whole read. Reads like a novel. Beautiful write Lee J. JL  |
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jellybeans Member Elite
since 2000-10-13
Posts 2298 |
wow, I guess I have never read you before, and I have been missing out....this is powerful and wonderfully crafted.....am printing to read again |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
LeeJ As always, deeply thoughtful and beautifully written wisdoms of life pages...so enjoyed!  |
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iliana Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434USA |
"I was sore ashamed for loving you that much Leaving the shell of my heart in the memory of a necklace Ironic, the talisman of bad luck Now….I scan the passersby Wishing sometimes, she were me, as I brew coffee for one pretending I knew all along, I wasn't his true north" LeeJ, I just don't know what to say. This poem was overwhelming, and musical. I don't think you should ever be ashamed of loving someone that much....; or perhaps, I should say, we have to forgive ourselves for that.....love is the teacher, I think, so, as hard as it is sometimes, I think we should have a certain gratitude. But then, having read so many of your poems, I think that you do have that.... ....jo |
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miscellanea Member Elite
since 2004-06-24
Posts 4060OH |
and you have a knack of placing us in that particular bottle to float musically through those places and emotions. Very much enjoyed, Lee J. I like what's been happening to your writing; it seems easier to read (perhaps organized a little differently?) But yet it retains that wonderful gift of traveling imagery. misc'e |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
amazing |
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ice Member Elite
since 2003-05-17
Posts 3404Pennsylvania |
LeeJ I wish Jim Croce could read this, he knew about this theme well...enjoyed this poem, even through its saddness... -------ice ><> |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
LeeJ Excellent write, good morning sweet. |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
Lee, to be able to love with such depth and abandon as you have done, shows just how deep and loving your soul truly is. I am so moved by this out-pouring of love and all the emotions and memories that you have so eloquently described, that I deem this poem a definite  I felt the pulse of this write into my very soul, Lee Poetessa With The Loving Heart. Warm, compassionate hugs, Linda |
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Magnus
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
You put one of life's truths and hardships into such a beautiful speaking of your heart to our own. This poem says so much, so beautifully. |
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inkedgoddess Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-19
Posts 7392Ohio |
Wishing sometimes, she were me, as I brew coffee for one pretending I knew all along, I wasn't his true north at the time you were and who knows more than the moment anyhow? you are blessed you found it if even for a moment, as you so joyously expressed its touch upon you |
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ThisDiamond Member Rara Avis
since 2002-02-22
Posts 9353Michigan, USA |
Certainly powerful, as powerful as the emotions that I understood so well. Magnificent write LeeJ... So many blessings still in the harvest. TD |
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Dark Stranger Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631West Coast |
snapshot shotglass memories by the gulp with bitter sweet and a lick of the skin to see if it is my hand holding the glass kewl stuff included ms enjoyed the texture of this pressed against the glass |
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Bonnie j Senior Member
since 2003-06-27
Posts 1588Ohio |
Ah! such beauty you have written in these lines. One should never regret loving someone so deeply. BonBon Philosophy; Put your love in a bottle and throw it out to sea. And in time it will come back to thee thrice. This love that returns by way of the sea will be in a touch, a smile and a soft spoken word. Hugs BonBon  |
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