In My Defense, It Was A Gift At Birth

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icebox
Member Elite

since 2003-05-03

Posts 4383
in the shadows

0 posted 2004-09-26 11:30 PM

I feel you
flowing
with the curling swirl of memories,
dancing naked,
hidden
in the twisting shadows of the rain;
wild stalking thoughts unleashed,
as if by wishing
you would make them come alive
to move clearly in the light
where I would not have to spend the cost of sleep
to see you,
reach for you,
once again
to let you share the meanings I have lost.

There is no heat in me this night,
it is as if the furnace of my soul has realized
I no longer have the right
to reach for you with open hand,
as if the man in me
suddenly
has grown too tired,
lived too long.
Was I wrong all these years,
an intruder unaware,
an uninvited guest at every banquet hall?
It is difficult to honor limits
when locks don’t answer to their call,
when walls do not hold me at all.

I was walking the Earth last time I slept,
freely wandering,
the paths of whimsies chosen by the wind.
I enjoy that means of travel more and more it seems
having found an easy doorway out of dreams,
being free to wander
without the pains of aging flesh and bones.
I spend so much time alone,
a quiet solitary audience to life,
I forget when I’m awake how crowded life can be,
when the mind has been released to see.

It has been years
since you willingly traveled down dream streets with me;
I guess foolishly I’d thought you had forgotten how.
Now I find I’m chasing sleep away,
as if by clinging to accepted sanity
I may regain the power
to defend the private territory of my soul.
I never have been interested in the quaintness of fair play;
I am not a share holder in the laws of turn about;

I am a hypocrite,
so sue me.
I’ve always wandered into others’ thoughts and dreams
without worrying,
without care
that anyone would dare notice I was there;
I guess my heart may have known it wasn’t right,
but I’ve never tried to profit from this sight.

©2004 by icebox

Midnitesun

Member Empyrean

since 2001-05-18

Posts 28647
Gaia

1 posted 2004-09-26 11:44 PM

going into the depths of another's heart and soul can be very uncomfortable, especially if you feel the door isn't really open

a heartfelt write, dear icebox

wranx
Member Elite

since 2002-06-07

Posts 3689
Moved from a shack to a barn

2 posted 2004-09-27 04:09 AM

Not universal, perhaps, not even common

But you chronicle..."Man"

Awesome write!

Enchantress
Member Empyrean

since 2001-08-14

Posts 35113
Canada eh.

3 posted 2004-09-27 09:30 AM

An awesome write!
I do hope you don't mind if I tuck this away into my library?
I didn't think so...you with the kind eyes.
~Morning smiles & hugs, Nancy~

~Autumn..the year's last, loveliest smile.~

Pilgrimage
Member Elite

since 2001-12-04

Posts 3945
Texas, USA

4 posted 2004-09-27 10:46 AM

'the quaintness of fair play' Yes. I like this one.

Nan (Pilgrim variety)

Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean

since 1999-07-07

Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla

5 posted 2004-09-27 11:08 AM

icebox
A literate ponderance, enjoyed the read.

Martie

Moderator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-09-21

Posts 28049
California

6 posted 2004-09-27 11:40 AM

icebox

"as if by wishing
you would make them come alive"

I have wished too. Much thought went into the writing of this.

DavePage
Member Elite

since 2003-12-21

Posts 2917

7 posted 2004-09-27 11:51 AM

I can really relate to this

Yes I enjoyed it

Dave

Ratleader

Member Rara Avis

since 2003-01-23

Posts 7026
Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass

8 posted 2004-09-27 01:46 PM

It's a hard lesson, and one I've had to learn too....that it can be a unique opportunity, a chance to give a blessing, or the worst kind of voyeurism...and the difference is incalculably small.

Walk softly, venture where you can....and have a kind heart.

~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº> ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
______________Ratleader______________

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean

since 2000-02-02

Posts 27738

9 posted 2004-09-27 04:43 PM

Pure gorgeousness--who could resist peeking?

(and grins at your title--it reminded me of a game of trivial pursuit I played with my sister once--she could "feel" me pulling the answers out of her head, she said, and would insist on another question--chuckle)

love this and love you m'friend.

You and your poetry are pure delight.

MGROVES

Member Elite

since 2004-02-01

Posts 3802
california

10 posted 2004-09-30 03:14 AM

always enjoy your wise words

iliana
Member Patricius

since 2003-12-05

Posts 13434
USA

11 posted 2004-10-01 11:47 PM

Gifts and curses....and we were meant to experience both, I think. Affirmations and confessions......also.

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