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soul drifter
Senior Member

since 2004-09-08

Posts 711
Colorado

0 posted 2004-09-13 02:57 PM

The Evening Sun

The flying standards of evening
purple and green nightclub mist
tealeaf readings on the corner
screaming out this frequency
just to get your attention

The evening sun sleeps
under the rusted bridges
the morning moon wakes
over the cable car street
just to get your attention

A mirrored city thriving
in speckled rain puddles
cars, trucks and pedestrians
weaken the wonder
just to get your attention

I have captured this wind
saved it in a green notebook
I have spied this daylight
transcribed it in blue ink
visitations on the sky
I have kept in my pockets
and posted them on traffic lights
just to get your attention
just to get your permission
to become part of your life
and understand your love
and tattoo it on my sleeve
next to my heart

"Poets are all who love, who feel great truths, and tell them; and the truth of truths is love." --Philip James Bailey

Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean

since 1999-07-07

Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla

1 posted 2004-09-13 03:02 PM

soul drifter
Enjoyed the read, thank you.

Enchantress
Member Empyrean

since 2001-08-14

Posts 35113
Canada eh.

2 posted 2004-09-13 03:04 PM

Very very nicely penned Zach!
Fantastic use of color and imagery.
Hugs~

~Autumn..the year's last, loveliest smile.~

iliana
Member Patricius

since 2003-12-05

Posts 13434
USA

3 posted 2004-09-13 08:38 PM

Oh, I really like this -- so much vivid imagery! Clicking library.

......jo

Greeneyes

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-09-09

Posts 9903
In Your Poetic Mind

4 posted 2004-09-13 08:55 PM

I have captured this wind
saved it in a green notebook
I have spied this daylight
transcribed it in blue ink
visitations on the sky
I have kept in my pockets
and posted them on traffic lights
just to get your attention
just to get your permission
to become part of your life
and understand your love
and tattoo it on my sleeve
next to my heart''''

I keep some many journals....this is just beautiful, I hope one day you will share your words with her' -- Indeed glad you are sharing with us....

I don’t want the world to see me
cause I don’t think that they’d understand
When everything’s made to be broken I just want you to know who I am

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

5 posted 2004-09-14 01:14 AM

yes...the imagery here is awesome
the ending is fantastic!

hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius

since 1999-07-05

Posts 10750
Glen Hope, PA USA

6 posted 2004-09-14 07:46 PM

BRAVO!!! Hmmm...need to read a few more of your posts, I enjoy your writes very much

sim0riah
Member

since 2004-09-07

Posts 253
Wyoming USA

7 posted 2004-09-15 04:47 PM

Very Nicely Done

sim0riah

Only at night you can see the depth of the sun

Sim0riah

BluesSerenade
Member Patricius

since 2001-10-23

Posts 10549
By the Seaside

8 posted 2004-09-19 01:01 PM

Got my attention!
This is lovely and easy on the eyes.

Beautiful heart speak, soul drifter.

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