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Lucie
Senior Member

since 1999-06-20

Posts 1077
Houston

0 posted 2004-08-30 09:56 AM

Drove into yur front yard just avoidin' yur kow.
My hawg had a kaniption, caught site of yur sow.
The younguns was whinin' cause we're outta RC.
And a wigglin' and moanin' cause they all gotta...use yur powder room.

You was asittin' and rockin' right there by the door.
And a'spittin' toe-bacca in a can on the floor.
You was drinkin' some shine from a jug with an X.
And your t-shirt read "Muddin' is better then Sex"

I whispered, "Dear Toerag, whose that yonder thar?"
"The big gal in the housedress with spit curls in her hair?"
She was lookin' real mean and holdin' a skillet.
Grabbed a free roamin' chicken with a grip that would killit.

You sed "That thars Suthern, an I can e'splain."
Why my Dad and my brother both have the same name.
She is my sister and I'm rightly glad.
She's also my mother, cause she married my dad.

Remember me with a smile on your face, or please don't remember me at all.

Midnitesun

Member Empyrean

since 2001-05-18

Posts 28647
Gaia

1 posted 2004-08-30 10:36 AM

ROTFLMAO! that's hilarious!

suthern

Member Seraphic

since 1999-07-29

Posts 20723
Louisiana

2 posted 2004-08-30 11:08 AM

Now wait rot here one gol-dang sec!
Yore tellin’ untrue tales, by heck!
You musta bounced too many checks
Thar ain’t NUTTIN’ better then sex!

Ye should have known Toe wuz a funnin’
And should be glad he wuzn’t runnin’
When you showed up at his front door
With stinking hawg and kids galore

Though gettin’ hitched may not be fated
Toerag and I’se not be related
He simply claimed a kin kunnection
To give him a bit of proteckshun

From the hongry look that lit your eyes
The minit thut you saw the size
Of his spankin’ new blue double-wide
(You began hummin’ “Here comes the bride!”)

But come on in, sit yoreself a spell
Jes remember that fish and guests soon smell!

ROFL... I've missed you, Lucie-lady! *S*

Toerag
Member Ascendant

since 1999-07-29

Posts 5622
Ala bam a

3 posted 2004-08-30 12:19 PM

Well this is just plain sweet yall....and funny as all hell and I've missed this lady rascal a bunch too....glad you're back Ms. Luce...

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

4 posted 2004-08-30 12:25 PM

hehehehehe

Mysteria

Member Laureate

since 2001-03-07

Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada

5 posted 2004-08-30 02:31 PM

Southern humor - now there is something I have truly misssed. Cute as the dickens Lucie.

Lucie
Senior Member

since 1999-06-20

Posts 1077
Houston

6 posted 2004-08-30 09:59 PM

Now hold on a minit,
you cracked Suthern belle.
My brats are well mannured
and I know I don't smell.
Cause I took a dip
in that 'ol cement pond.
An me an 'ol Toerag
got a real special bond.
Yur just real jealous
of my purdy blonde hair.
And my big rosy cheeks.
These up here, not down thar.
You claim ya love Toe
thats not how thangs appear.
'Cause I seed ya winkin'
and a flirtin' with 'Deer.

Remember me with a smile on your face, or please don't remember me at all.

Toerag
Member Ascendant

since 1999-07-29

Posts 5622
Ala bam a

7 posted 2004-08-31 06:58 AM

You been winkin' at deer?....When was the last time you had your eyes checked?....

suthern

Member Seraphic

since 1999-07-29

Posts 20723
Louisiana

8 posted 2004-08-31 08:16 AM

That weren't no wink
Jes a nervous tic
Such filthy lies
Just make me sick!
If yore Toe's choice
I'll wish him well...
He'll dang shore need it -
Adios, farewell!

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