Dark Poetry #1 |
can i just come out and say it? |
monique Member
since 2000-02-03
Posts 369Louisiana |
Who am I? I don't know Where do I come from? From my mommy's hole in the head Filling it with my dad's pretty words Enrolling her in a ride to Valdor Screaming Yes at the top of her lung Full of smoke she can't see The futur in her panties It's too dark in there We have to cut her open To see the light Of where babies come from Demented people hungry for sex To create more lonely folks Searching for love monique forgive me if i am out of place |
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© Copyright 2000 monique - All Rights Reserved | |||
Jana Tovey Member
since 2000-05-30
Posts 257USA |
I don't think you're out of place, but I think you're mad about the place you came from! The graphics add to the angry tone of your poem. I like this. I hope it helped to write it down. |
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Isis Member Ascendant
since 1999-09-06
Posts 6296Sunny Queensland |
No you are not out of place as long as you don't get any more graphic than this!! I liked this hon, and I'm sorry you feel that way about your birth. Perhaps the conceiving might have been accident, but carrying a child around for 9 months inside of you changes a woman forever... Great work I'll tell you this...... No eternal reward will forgive us now for wasting the dawn..... ~Isis~ (Goddess - Sovereign of the Spirit) |
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brian madden Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374ireland |
WOW....that was like a slap across the face, the anger and the energy in this. Some really powerful images. intense, I hope writing this down has helped release some of the anger. take care.really enjoyed the poem. ------------------------ "I've been too honest with myself I should have lied like everybody else"-Richey Edwards "Take nothing but pictures. Leave nothing but footprints. Kill nothing but time". Baltimore Grotto "Libraries gave us power Then work came and made us free What price now for a shallow piece of dignity" Nicky Wire, A design for Life. manic street preachers La Tristesse Durera (Scream to a Sigh) "Life has been unfaithful And it all promised so so much I am a relic I am just a petrified cry Wheeled out once a year, a cenotaph souvenir The applause nails down my silence La tristesse durera Scream to a sigh, to a sigh I see liberals I am just a fashion accessory People send postcards And they all hope I'm feeling well I retreat into self-pity, it's so easy Where they patronise my misery La tristesse durera Scream to a sigh, to a sigh I sold my medal It paid a bill It sells at market stalls Parades Milan catwalks The sadness will never go Will never go away Baby it's here to stay |
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Joel the wolf Senior Member
since 2000-04-06
Posts 1333Angels Camp |
Yes very powerful kid, I would not want to spar with you . haha Joel. I howl a mournful song, that echos within my chambered heart, for all to read? nay for all to feel. |
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