wishes from a yesteryear - pipTalk Forums

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X Angel
Senior Member

since 1999-11-07

Posts 1521
Oregon

0 posted 2000-03-17 06:04 PM

in a whisper of the wind I hear
wishes from a yesteryear
saving from a falling grace
gently now, I've found my place
call me not into the sun
let me sleep til day is done
no more sun to mock my eyes
no more tongues spilling lies
slip me down in ebony rest
let my soul no more be blessed
tell a lie so kind it's cruel
dare me not to break the rule
I'll love you not, this day or ever
from your clench I long to sever
can I not disguise my need?
when I long, my heart be freed
you no more suffice my yen
as into dark I slip again

"Caution: Cape does not enable user to fly."
-Batman Costume warning label

Dark Enchantress
Senior Member

since 1999-07-27

Posts 1258
meet Morgana

1 posted 2000-03-17 06:41 PM

This was beautiful X Angel...so graceful and vivid. Relates to me very well...but I don't think I've ever worded it as good.

Yours truly,
Angel

"The dark weight of the hour
humming madly
filling my head
with blood
and sorrow
and dread
the executioner's song."
-Jewel
"The Dark Bells"

~*Angel of Darkness*~

danni
Senior Member

since 1999-11-20

Posts 688
wisconsin

2 posted 2000-03-18 10:26 AM

sadly graceful. very well done.

i love too much, and not enough.

Janet Marie
Member Laureate

since 2000-01-22

Posts 18554

3 posted 2000-03-18 11:11 AM

you slip in to the dark with poetic grace in this one angel...very well expressed.
take care, jm

Now for me some words come easy
But I know that they don't mean that much
Compared with the things that are said when lovers touch
You never knew what I loved in you
I don't know what you loved in me
Maybe the picture of somebody you were hoping I might be
jackson browne

Isis
Member Ascendant

since 1999-09-06

Posts 6296
Sunny Queensland

4 posted 2000-03-18 07:39 PM

Dark yet beautiful, really enjoyed this, X Angel!!

May the world hug you today,
With it's warmth and love.
I pray it whispers a joyful tune in your heart,
That tell you there is a friend sitting in another corner of the world,
Wishing you well and
wishing you love......
~Isis~
(Goddess - Sovereign of the Spirit)

Aiden Kelly
Member

since 2000-02-14

Posts 148
Ft. Wayne, IN USA

5 posted 2000-03-19 01:38 AM

i love the rhyme and meter thing! i so envy you that ability for i admit i stink at meter! iambs and i just do not get along!

but you convey such emotion with so little. so emphatic! i love it! you are good, my friend! look forward to reading more of your work!

StarrGazer
Senior Member

since 2000-03-05

Posts 679
Texas

6 posted 2000-03-19 02:42 AM

X-Angel great job !!!!

"A poet is one who spends a lifetime standing out in thunderstorms, waiting to be hit by lightning"
~Randal Jarrell~

Lone Wolf
Member Ascendant

since 2000-03-16

Posts 5842
Lansing, MI USA

7 posted 2000-03-19 10:00 PM

X-angel...dark and well done. Nice meter...wish I could do that!!

Friends are friend forever if the Lord's the Lord of them and a friend will not say never cause the welcome will not end.
--Michael W. Smith

Jannel
Member

since 2000-01-18

Posts 492
Muncie, IN, USA

8 posted 2000-03-19 10:27 PM

excellent wording, especially "tell a lie so kind it's cruel." and the rhyme fit very well. it didn't seem at all forced. great work.
jannel

"I'm just saying
that we've mistaken one
for thousands of words,
and for that mistake
I've caused you such pain
that I damn that word."
-10000 Maniacs "Jezebel"

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