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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

0 posted 2004-06-12 08:30 AM



At a Loss … [Konrad begins]

I started her poem
below the dust.

My mouth, still dry,
started filling
from the fount,
laying in wait,
waiting for words,
that were beginning to well
from within.

But where were the right words,
that could express all?

The moth laid still, singed though it was,
but alive, heart beating, waiting,

and I thought of the moth
in flight, glittering around a flame,
and I wrote to Dana,
even knowing she had moved on.

I had loved you
More than you could know
You were my light
I, your moth


Pen to teeth, lips in purse,
no, she had not cursed
my absence, but made it known
she needed me, and a home,
though my wanderlust had crazed
my mind, my thoughts, my gaze,
as I stepped to steps from history
and then I was gone
from her life…
then she turned to another as wife,
and the song that sung for her in my heart,
had left dusty traces
from the very start.

My hand took on a life of its own
as paper crumbled, found its round home
to write of failures
of one’s love,
was not quite the poem
I’d been thinking of.

But still…and all, she needed to know
just why the winds had blown so cold.

In my heart, I would start,
that scattered thoughts
would wind again,
onto a new sheet
with a new pen.

[the sound of scratching can be heard
upon the wind, by song of bird…]

[This message has been edited by Sunshine (06-14-2004 05:02 PM).]

© Copyright 2004 Karilea Rilling Jungel - All Rights Reserved
Nightshade
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-08-31
Posts 13962
just out of reach
1 posted 2004-06-12 09:14 AM


In my heart, I would start,
that scattered thoughts
would wind again,
onto a new sheet
with a new pen.

[the sound of scratching can be heard
upon the wind, by song of bird…]


Yes...yes? The words might be?
Enjoying this Karilea! hugs, Chris

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
2 posted 2004-06-12 09:19 AM


"In my heart, I would start,
that scattered thoughts
would wind again,
onto a new sheet
with a new pen.

[the sound of scratching can be heard
upon the wind, by song of bird…]"

Looks like my sister and I both enjoyed the same part of this piece as our favourite Karilea....yes...write on.

Hugs~

Dark Angel
Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095

3 posted 2004-06-12 07:43 PM


WOW!

I saw it all before my eyes.

Maree

The clouds never expect it when it rains, but the sea, changes colour, but the sea, does not change.
~Stevie Nicks~

iliana
Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434
USA
4 posted 2004-06-12 07:45 PM


Gotta bump this up so people can read in order.  So enjoyed.  ....jo
Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

5 posted 2004-06-12 10:49 PM


The moth laid still, singed thought it was,
but alive, heart beating, waiting,

=================================

ahh.... this I know well.....

now one to number 3...
more gleeeeeeeeeeeee  

Ericc
Member Elite
since 2003-01-31
Posts 4178

6 posted 2004-06-13 01:37 PM


Every line...beautifuly crafted.

Eric

Duncan
Member Ascendant
since 2001-08-07
Posts 5455

7 posted 2004-06-13 03:56 PM


"But where were the right words,
that could express all?

The moth laid still, singed thought it was,
but alive, heart beating, waiting,

and I thought of the moth
in flight, glittering around a flame,
and I wrote to Dana,
even knowing she had moved on.

I had loved you
More than you could know
You were my light
I, your moth"


And so it begins, can't wait for more Kari.  Konnie, get to scratchin'...  


Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
8 posted 2004-06-13 04:55 PM


Karilea

"My hand took on a life of its own
as paper crumbled, found its round home
to write of failures
of one’s love,
was not quite the poem
I’d been thinking of."

I love the rhythm and rhyme in parts of this and of course your wonderful ability as a story teller of heart things.  

Kevo
Member
since 2004-06-02
Posts 466
Navarro County, Texas, USA
9 posted 2004-06-13 05:19 PM


I didn't read this one.  I watched it!  It was a beautiful example of imagery and clarity.  What a great write.

Kevin

Magnus
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135
South Carolina, USA
10 posted 2004-06-13 05:52 PM


and all, she needed to know
just why the winds had blown so cold


A simple but profound point....

You write these rather well Lady Sun....

enjoyable reading...

JL
Member Ascendant
since 2004-04-01
Posts 6128
Texas, USA
11 posted 2004-06-14 04:58 PM


I was there.  You had me drawn into this write.  I was feeling a need to help.  Very interesting write.  Enjoyed.

JL

She said: ”You look cute in the dark.”


scorpio
Member Ascendant
since 2002-10-02
Posts 5178
right...there
12 posted 2004-06-14 07:40 PM


You've captured my attention...

believe in what your heart feels...

Sadelite
Member Elite
since 2003-10-11
Posts 2519

13 posted 2004-06-14 08:17 PM


Suhshine,
   You leave me wordless (except for those four and these seven!)
              Sadelite

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