Open Poetry #32 |
velma's way |
serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
I watched this woman fingering the tabletop of worn veneer, where her man had shuffled cards in solitaire too many years as she stirred his dinner pots begging him to stop in French "You're ruining my finish, chez" in English "why do you do this?" fussing head and gathering the cards from shaky hands. "Here, old man, it's time to eat." Somehow she always said that sweet, just before his ample feed. Tonight I saw her fingering the scratches of his obstinance. I held her hand in selfishness as she sang to me in French, "what madness is this wedded bliss?" she grinned her dittying of kiss and how the myth of wedding ring-- is nothing but a stubborn streak... she let slip a tear and I watched it travel from her eye down the valley of her cheek to rest upon the scratchings there after it had crossed her lips dripping fate resigned she smiled and sang to us his death, and then the silence broke my heart. |
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© Copyright 2004 serenity blaze - All Rights Reserved | |||
iliana Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434USA |
Serenity Blaze -- I am so touched by this. There is such sensitivity and observation in this poem, as well as deep compassion expressed so humbly. Exquisitely beautiful picture of the loss (if beautiful can be used in this context). Sorry for your friend's and your loss. |
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wranx Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689Moved from a shack to a barn |
Gads! yer killin' me here m'witch! Awfully nice writing though... |
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brian sites Senior Member
since 2002-06-25
Posts 1475usa |
an Artist of Movement this is your gift |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
Incredible! Gorgeous Maree The clouds never expect it when it rains, but the sea, changes colour, but the sea, does not change. |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Like this...James |
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majnu
since 2002-10-13
Posts 1088SF Bay Area |
you really saw her. well done. -majnu |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
you write about people well |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
thank you, and? had I been competent enough to write the sounds of an accordian between these lines, then and only then I would have come close to an apt portrayal of these people. Dear to my coon ass heart, they are. Rest in peace, Mr. Gibbs. |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
I knew when I saw the title I would need a Kleenex. I was correct. I hope you continue to bring Velma's ways, and days, to us keeper lines. These are all keeper lines. |
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muted
since 2004-01-15
Posts 2949Elapsing, Eclipsing, Evolving |
oh, this was soooooo well done |
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PKreturns Member
since 2003-07-21
Posts 362New Orleans, LA |
I love your uniqueness...love reading all of yours. |
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garysgirl
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Karen, I love the way that you can see inside of people and then tell us about them....... Hugs, |
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Susan Caldwell Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348Florida |
I wish for Velma's strength... "cast me gently into the morning, for the night has been unkind" |
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Bonnie j Senior Member
since 2003-06-27
Posts 1588Ohio |
You are touching the heart strings ever so gently with this one.You can see your words as they dance across the screen of the mind. Very touching. BonBon |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
As this does mine. Simply superb! |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Ser...you make us feel as though we have known the people forever. Rest in peace Mr. Gibbs. Hugs and love ya sweet lady~ |
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