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Open Poetry #32
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If You Aren't Here To Kill Me, Why Did You Track Me Down?
| Open Poetry #32 |
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If You Aren't Here To Kill Me, Why Did You Track Me Down? |
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icebox Member Elite
since 2003-05-03
Posts 4383in the shadows 
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I do not understand how you are able to talk with me today casually as a friend who simply went away, for a little while. I never lied to you; I just left out a lot of truth. Today by email we share jokes and anecdotes of simple times, ignoring crimes of passion law and heart; it is true back when I knew you in our youth, I deceived you but that was part of a job I was sworn to do. I deceived everyone who moved within that little world; as a tribe we thought we were in a new universe of light, energized by flowers, drugs, sex, music, detached from reality by the rude beliefs we absolutely knew were right and had drawn clearly in the ink of unfounded free opinion, but it wasn't really light you saw, when you looked at me, it was simply social static dressed up in make believe; it was nothing connected to you, cold blood always is pragmatic. You are right that there were times I would disappear in a crowd; like walking West 11th until we'd turn at the bodega, except that I'd be gone as you all kept walking on, and I'd be gone the night, or days or weeks or more, just to reappear flush with cash until one day I never did again, but usually the music was so very loud, and you had friends all around, and that kind of disappearing never makes a sound. I never told you how I felt, and you didn't really want to know, where I went, what I did, for what I had been paid, or why I made sure I was out of sight when your eyes went searching looking through the lens of need, the way young women will from time to time; you know, the kind of need that always is denied when morning rolls around. Don't you see now why it wasn't you? I had to be sure for you it wasn't ever me. ©2004 by icebox |
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| © Copyright 2004 icebox - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
icebox difficult to know what to say.  |
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Marge Tindal 
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
IceBox~ You are always such an interesting read~ 'when your eyes went searching looking through the lens of need the way young women will from time to time; you know, the kind of need that always is denied when morning rolls around.' Such depth in your thoughts ...~ *Huglets* ~*Marge*~ ~*When the heart grieves over what it has lost, |
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iliana Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434USA |
The title grabbed me, of course. But the poem, wow, did that take me back to the scene of my college years. Those were the best and worst of times. ....jo |
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LucidityNow Member
since 2001-02-06
Posts 118Canada |
but it wasn't really light you saw, when you looked at me, it was simply social static dressed up in make believe; cold blood always is pragmatic. I'm blown away by this poem. Quite the journey into a past, filled with excitement, but with the details left out even in the recollection!!! I love it, it makes me feel like I am the person you are talking to, still obsessed with the mystery that is you. Great! and i'm certain that if i drive into those trees, it would make less of a mess, than she's made of me... |
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MGROVES
since 2004-02-01
Posts 3802california |
wow took me back in time, some good,some bad, memories. great write  |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
you make me speechless |
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Pilgrimage Member Elite
since 2001-12-04
Posts 3945Texas, USA |
Revelatory-is that a word? Anyway, this reveals a lot. You know, friendship can be true when everything it's wrapped up in is a lie. Nan (Pilgrim variety) |
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Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia |
"it was simply social static dressed up in make believe;" What a fabulous line, it is really telling. Here in the midst of my lonely abyss, a single joy I find...your presence in my mind. Unknown |
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jellybeans Member Elite
since 2000-10-13
Posts 2298 |
powerful in its honesty.....good read |
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Susan Member Ascendant
since 2004-03-27
Posts 5104walking the surreal |
Interesting read. It truly does move one through time, and I was but a babe. Susan |
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Susan Caldwell Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348Florida |
Ah the lies... I have a hard time accepting even the smallest.. This one is too hard to respond to.. "cast me gently into the morning, for the night has been unkind" |
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Endlessecho Member
since 2003-09-05
Posts 398I live within myself |
Wow. There really isn't much I can say. So much is already inside this peice. |
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