»
Archives
»
Open Poetry #31
»
Post to Poet DeVines challenge,,,,The Trunk
| Open Poetry #31 |
|
Post to Poet DeVines challenge,,,,The Trunk |
|
Michelle_loves_Mike
since 2003-12-20
Posts 1189Pennsylvania 
|
The Trunk Sunbeams dance over its dusty surface thru the attic window As a spotlight shows focus anticipation runs thru Heart hammering trembling fingers caress its skin Worn from ages use Imagination upon imagination! treasures within maps marked with X.. Coins from pirates seized... the click of the lock deafening Sure all have heard one breath,,,two,,,,,safe Eyes closed tight the lid raises slow.... Hours pass as the props finally catch daring to look.... My treasure awaits... I wish all could find the true happiness I have found,,in the eyes of Mike |
||
| © Copyright 2004 Michelle Albright - All Rights Reserved | |||
|
Ericc Member Elite
since 2003-01-31
Posts 4178 |
Wow...you really capture the moment of anticipation here! Eric |
||
|
Michelle_loves_Mike
since 2003-12-20
Posts 1189Pennsylvania |
Thank you so much,, Michelle I wish all could find the true happiness I have found,,in the eyes of Mike |
||
|
nakdthoughts Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200Between the Lines |
It's very nice Michelle...a moment of treasuring what's left behind. I am no critic, but maybe if you tried the challenge again and brought out some of what is in the trunk... as PdV challenged... show or express what might have been childhood dreams or hopes...placed for safe keeping. *s M |
||
Ringo
since 2003-02-20
Posts 3684Saluting with misty eyes |
Heart hammering trembling fingers caress its skin Worn from ages use Such imagery... Michelle, you know I absolutely adore your writing, and this is just another fine example. But now the animal is in pain... |
||
|
Toerag Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622Ala bam a |
Very well done gal.... The Trunk LongJohn's love for animals Is more than just a fetish, When you talk about it His face turns very reddish When he was but a young lad, At age of twenty two He had dreams most every night, To work at Maryland's zoo. Tigers, lions, snakes or ants, He loved them all the same, His favorite was an elephant, Matilda was her name. Once before the zoo Had opened for the day, LongJohn bathed Matilda, In his usual way. He took all of his clothes off Was in his birthday suit Matilda looked perplexed at him Thought he looked very cute. Now LongJohn was just humming, And soon began to sing, Then Matilda questioned LongJohn, "Can you breathe through that thing? It's not what ya "thunk" She's referring to his "trunk" |
||
|
iliana Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434USA |
Michelle -- this is one of your best! |
||
|
Michelle_loves_Mike
since 2003-12-20
Posts 1189Pennsylvania |
nakd....thank you for your tips,the angle I was going for, was leaving people hanging,,to fill in what the treasure waiting was,,,,, Rigno...thank you dear, as you know, you opinion means all to me toerag..thank you so much, and I loved your poem! iliana..I'm glad you liked my write,,,I try my best I wish all could find the true happiness I have found,,in the eyes of Mike |
||
|
Copperbell Senior Member
since 2003-11-08
Posts 956 |
I like this! I have a trunk - filled to the brim; my grandpa made it for my grandma when they were both 17 - you bring fond memories with this one - might just have to go try on my wedding dress again  |
||
|
muted
since 2004-01-15
Posts 2949Elapsing, Eclipsing, Evolving |
i could see the moment, i could feel it |
||
|
passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
this is touching |
||
|
Michelle_loves_Mike
since 2003-12-20
Posts 1189Pennsylvania |
Copperbell,,,,,go for it! Playing dress up, never goes out of style Muted,,,,,,,,,,Great! Theres nothing like the build up before the discovery,,,,the reality of what you find, cant touch the imagination Passing shadows,,,thank you much Michelle I wish all could find the true happiness I have found,,in the eyes of Mike |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
