Open Poetry #31 |
Carry On |
BluesSerenade Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549By the Seaside |
~*~ Carry on down the marsh through streaming lakes where water pools in ponds. Leaving your reflection calm in the wake glassed over in the silence. Ripples in the mirror pouring rain in cold pockets dripping tears off my eyelashes. Look for me or leave me alone face down in tall grass. Turning away from the sky to bury my heart so my sorrow doesn't show. As the snow melts away running down a ravine catching up with the spring. I'll miss those long summer days down by the sea when I planned my vacation around you. Like a favorite song caught up in the wind I'll carry on without you. ~The End~ |
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steavenr Member Elite
since 2003-11-17
Posts 4058 |
you have such a naturalistic way of writing good poetry. Loved that last stanza: "Like a favorite song caught up in the wind I'll carry on without you." so thought provoking and so well defined |
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Mistletoe Angel
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
(big angel hugs) Awwwwwww, this is sad but beautiful, sweet friend, you will carry on and will grow richer in love as you are bound to remember all those lyrics dancing in the wind in a whole more sonorous re-mix, God Bless You, yay, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Lori, thank you for sharing! May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton "You'll find something that's enough to keep you |
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inkedgoddess Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-19
Posts 7392Ohio |
As the snow melts away running down a ravine catching up with the spring. I'll miss those long summer days down by the sea when I planned my vacation around you. Like a favorite song caught up in the wind I'll carry on without you. love how it flowed up and down into that stream of love ooh love, stay warm and wonderful, girlie as always, this is a gem |
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HopeS Member Elite
since 2000-12-22
Posts 4596Perth Western Australia |
excellently expressed in the most beautiful way Yes someway , somehow , life goes on , although in our hearts we are missing someone Hope |
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Ratleader
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass |
They are good....every line. I like the way you sewed this poetic garment together -- with a light but sure touch. Here's to tomorrow! ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº> ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº> |
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the_loner_23 Member Ascendant
since 2002-06-08
Posts 5479Jacksonville, Florida, USA |
I like the expression of sadness. Awesome poem. Cold hands means a warm heart |
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Richy Member Elite
since 2003-05-03
Posts 3050 |
There’s all of these marshes around here, in protected wildlife lands, that I like to go to instead of my daily walk down by the canal. And although, I haven’t been out there all winter long, your story, brought some vivid imagery back to mind. “Look for me or leave me alone face down in tall grass. Turning away from the sky to bury my heart so my sorrow doesn't show.” That, unfortunately is something I can relate, all too well with.. As well as, favorite songs, caught up in the wind Now as far as, carrying on goes... Well... that’s one, I’m still working on... You hang in there, okay Bluesy? Long summer days, down by the sea can’t be too far off... In fact... I think they were made, just for you... |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
oh gawd! this is good and sad |
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nakdthoughts Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200Between the Lines |
there's ALWAYS tomorrow..and me remember that hugs M |
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Kahlil Senior Member
since 2003-04-12
Posts 1881 |
"The End" Sounds like it was time for that. Spring is coming and, along with time, will bring healing. ~K~ |
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Michelle_loves_Mike
since 2003-12-20
Posts 1189Pennsylvania |
Like a favorite song caught up in the wind I'll carry on without you. What a great way to ell someone they hold nothing over you! great write Michelle I wish all could find the true happiness I have found,,in the eyes of Mike |
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Gentle Spirit Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989 |
Lori, this is so touching. Hey gal, love that new pic too! |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Lori...You will carry on...I can feel the strength in your words...and the memory will remain. Beautiful poem of loss and growth! |
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garysgirl
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Like a favorite song caught up in the wind I'll carry on without you. ~The End~ Lori, this last part shows what great amount of strength you have. This is beautiful, even though sad. Hugs, my friend Ethel |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
Look for me or leave me alone face down in tall grass. Turning away from the sky to bury my heart so my sorrow doesn't show. Your pen pours such beauty... *S* And I'm going to show my age (like it doesn't show whether I allow or not! LOL)... for your title reminds me of an old CSNY song... "Carry on, love is coming, love is coming to us all." May it come soon. *S* |
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Grover Senior Member
since 2004-01-27
Posts 1967London, ON, Canada |
An exceptional poem! Grover. |
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iliana Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434USA |
Great poem, Bluesy! |
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vandana
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463USA |
great poem! |
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Greeneyes
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903In Your Poetic Mind |
Like a favorite song caught up in the wind I'll carry on without you.''' ~~ awwww Lori you're tugging heart strings here....heart hugs pretty lady.... Lauren~ I lie awake at night |
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Margherita Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236Eternity |
Lori, this moves my heart. You write so beautifully. Love and hugs. Margherita |
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BluesSerenade Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549By the Seaside |
Thank you everyone for reading my mood poetry. Hugs and *shrugs* |
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