Open Poetry #31 |
Quiver |
Magnus
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
Whisper again my love, caress my heart in spoken sigh. Lie upon my rising breast... Look into a knowing eye... Touch my soul in quivered rest, the notch of arrow flying true. Give to me my waking quest... Love me as you will and do. Take from my hand a gentle steal of warmness laid in bonds once made. Of mountains high above, surreal. In silence shadows...once displayed. For in the eye, the twinkle of shall bring to lips a wanting smile. A silken stroke of softest glove, a kiss then joined, a journey’s mile. [This message has been edited by Magnus (01-30-2004 08:32 PM).] |
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© Copyright 2004 Barry J. Tackett - All Rights Reserved | |||
Michelle_loves_Mike
since 2003-12-20
Posts 1189Pennsylvania |
Cupid has the right angle Michelle I wish all could find the true happiness I have found,,in the eyes of Mike |
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Amara Member
since 2003-02-23
Posts 158East of the moon, west of the sun. |
It's sweet. ^^ "Take the hand of my rugged feel," is the only beat-imbalanced line- the syllables are right, but the meter's off. Notice that you try to fit 'of my' into one syllable, when they need to be two seperate ones? Rearranging or substituting will fix that, if you want to take the time. Light keep you always, Amara To see something as an end is to mourn for it; to see it as a beginning is to have hope. |
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vandana
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463USA |
one of my fovrite from you enjoyed this |
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EverRuss Member
since 2003-12-31
Posts 66Indiana |
Magnus, beautiful piece of work. I really love it. It reminds me of my style of writing and i like that lol. But great peace of writing If my poems could talk they would mean more than the words |
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Richy Member Elite
since 2003-05-03
Posts 3050 |
Hiya Magnus, How’ve you been? It’s nice to be reading you again. You really are, a modern day Shakespeare. Seriously And now, as I bow to you sir... Please have a most pleasant time, on this midwinter’s night eve... (hey, I gave it a shot... lol) And for art thou... a joyous, and gratifying weekend... |
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Goodknight Member Elite
since 2002-06-15
Posts 2386Ohio, USA |
barry - you write romance so wonderfully and so richly - this is great - Paul |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
well dangit, there you go again....... swoooooooosh! |
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1slick_lady Member Ascendant
since 2000-12-22
Posts 6088standing on a shadow's lace |
sighhhhhhhhhhh |
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KristieSue
since 2003-01-31
Posts 1460PA, US |
very passionate write ;-) "Painting is poetry which is seen and not heard, and poetry is a painting which is heard but not seen." ~Leonardo da Vinci |
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Marsha
since 2000-07-10
Posts 7423Maidstone Kent England |
Magnus darling man, Oh my why is do you think that whenever I think of romance it seems to carry within it a taste of you? Possibly because no one can do it better, and its true you know no one can do it better. Utterly, utterly outstanding writing, I do come and fill my soul with delight you know, but normally I stay in the shadows. Just occasionally I visit you all in open, instead of scuttling straight off to the archives, but wherever I go I always read your work and marvel at the consistently brilliance of your art. Truly exceptional even from you who writes beauty always. as always Mushy Tomorrow is another day I don't know what it holds |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Oooh another sigh up here in Canada! Great one Barry. Hugs~ ~ Is that love I see in your eyes... |
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LeeJ Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296 |
Hi Barry and Good day to you What a beauty written down from the archives of your precious soul...this was beautiful |
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Ariana Senior Member
since 2000-10-08
Posts 571Orlando, Florida |
Barry Another sigh -- a big one -- from Florida. Ariana |
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scorpio Member Ascendant
since 2002-10-02
Posts 5178right...there |
Barry, I've always enjoyed your writes. But this has to be one of your best. Truly inspired writing in this post. believe in what your heart feels... |
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Mistletoe Angel
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
(big angel hugs) Awwwwwwww, this is beautiful, sweet friend, the cupid has been practicing so well, yay, God Bless You, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Barry, thank you for sharing! May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton "You'll find something that's enough to keep you |
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SimplyGold Senior Member
since 2002-07-10
Posts 1453 |
Magnus, Love it! "Touch my soul in quivered rest, the notch of arrow flying true. Give to me my waking quest... Love me as you will and do." SG |
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jaicie114 Senior Member
since 2003-09-27
Posts 750On the edge of forever |
Whew, Magnus...you've got me quivering with all the rest...very nice! Thank you. Love and Light...jc This I know as Truth...we are all Beings of Light. |
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iliana Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434USA |
"Touch my soul in quivered rest, the notch of arrow flying true. Give to me my waking quest... Love me as you will and do." Above is my favorite stanza. What a Cupid's arrow for someone! Outstanding! |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
For in the eye, the twinkle of shall bring to lips a wanting smile. A silken stroke of softest glove, a kiss then joined, a journey’s mile. ~*~ A love's eye should always twinkle... smiling on this... ing at you! |
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Grover Senior Member
since 2004-01-27
Posts 1967London, ON, Canada |
Exceptional! Grover. |
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Kie Member
since 2004-02-01
Posts 77USA |
This is the first poem I have read on this site. It was magnificent. |
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LeeJ Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296 |
For in the eye, the twinkle of shall bring to lips a wanting smile. A silken stroke of softest glove, a kiss then joined, a journey’s mile. an beautiful painting you have created here. |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Substantial...James |
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Kristabell Senior Member
since 2003-11-29
Posts 678Portland, OR |
great peace. Very sweet. Love your writing! |
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GG Member Elite
since 2002-12-03
Posts 3532Lost in thought |
ohhh *sigh* I don't know how you do this.. you always do. Always, Alyssa He was a man of sorrows |
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