Teen Poetry #7 |
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Drifting Away |
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A.L Member
since 2003-03-15
Posts 131![]() |
** Drifting Away ** Holding out and hanging on for all of the wrong reasons, It seems that nothing can replace that comfort, nothing I can believe in, Why am I holding on, what do I have to lose? We fight, I cry, I prove myself, but what do I have to prove? Your wrong and you know it placing all the blame on me, All my questions go unanswered, your lying, why can't I see? Change the subject, pretend I'm not there, Look past me again, pretend you don't care I'm there but I don't exist, I'm only your shadow and I won't be missed, Seeing right through me, like you always do It's like you'll never feel what I felt through you, I'm gone and you don't even notice Or is it that you don't even care? I'm lonely and I hoped you would know this Or at least pretend that you want to be there, Every night I lie awake wondering if its worth it, I cry myself to sleep praying to forget, Where are you now, why can't you hear me? Your here but somehow, my face you can't see, We're drifting away, we're falling apart, In my head you'll stay, always breaking my heart, I love you, I'm hurt, I'm lonely, I'm confused, I find myself asking if I've only been used, Can you love something so much when it isn't even there? Can you feel and still believe? Can you call this love cause it's not fair I shouldn't wan't to have to leave, Will you miss me when I'm gone? Or will it all just be the same? Will you find where you belong? Where will you place the blame? Nothing is what you gave me, Nothing left for you to take, Gave you all I had, only adding to the mistake, I won't say a word, You can't hear me anyway, Keep your eyes closed, You wouldn't see me if I stayed, Just remember someone loved you once you forget my face, It won't take you too long, cause I was never there to be erased, A silent reminder of you, will stay with me everyday, Your a part of me I won't forget, even though you threw me away... |
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© Copyright 2004 Alison - All Rights Reserved | |||
Star T Member
since 2002-07-12
Posts 182Philadelphia, US |
DRIFTING AWAY AS THE TITLE?C'MON U CAN DO BETTER!THAT BELITTLES THE POEM. Jesus died that you might live...accept that and u shall be saved. |
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DancinQueen![]()
since 2000-07-29
Posts 1092Kokomo,IN,USA |
Hmm...I thought this was particularly beautiful. Poetry always gave me a voice when I fell silent to my emotions. The best poetry is filled with those raw emotions and you've done a wonderful job ![]() **You can't always trust the people you want to** |
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A.L Member
since 2003-03-15
Posts 131 |
"Letting go of what wasn't" would be a great title for another poem I have..I'm not sure if it fits this one though...cause I'm not really letting go yet, its really us drifting away I guess....have any other suggestions??? |
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lilibeelee Member
since 2001-07-12
Posts 143 |
I like this one a lot!! |
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BrokenDreams Member
since 2003-02-09
Posts 425In The Clouds |
I loved this poem! Everything about it was perfect, although I agree that the title doesn't quite do it justice. I'd help you come up with something else, but I suck at coming up with titles. Anyway, good write, and thanks for the read. Jen Whoever said "Tis better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all" obviously never loved. |
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Snickers123 Member
since 2004-05-07
Posts 94United States-Iowa |
I absolutely loved it!! you deffinetly have talent, keep writing, i cant wait to read more from you, your title was fine. keep it up!! ~*.:Leah:.*~ |
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*Alli4000*![]()
since 2004-03-21
Posts 3188The World of Poetry |
You have ALOT of talent!!! Keep Writing!!! ~Alli~ |
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