»
Archives
»
Dark Poetry #4
»
Clarity
| Dark Poetry #4 |
|
Clarity |
|
|
pyre Member
since 2008-05-16
Posts 136 |
In the sky Beneath my eye The father's breath is breeched Angry bird In defiled word My mind is smothered by your screech The little room upstairs Holds wars in pairs Surely a win must be strong Battles only last so long Swift reversal of the times Moods changed and swung With divinity of transgressions Eyes sight their tongue Flakes that make the dust Give a bloody upward thrust And a soaring screaming eagle Lets go of its mighty trust ---------------------------------- This poem isn't intended to be about WAMU, Iraq, or America; but interpret as you will. Does she pray? Am I prey? The strength of reality demands honesty and this path is in a shovel... |
||
| © Copyright 2008 Kenneth Craig Rogers - All Rights Reserved | |||
JenniferMaxwell
since 2006-09-14
Posts 2423 |
Interesting poem. Enjoyed. |
||
|
fractal007 Senior Member
since 2000-06-01
Posts 1958 |
Thanks for the warning, but I didn't need it to be honest. I saw a poem about a child hearing its parents fighting upstairs. Of course the screaming bird doesn't fit well into that interpretation  .Life's short. Think hard! |
||
|
The Esoteric Being Junior Member
since 2008-07-22
Posts 34MA, USA |
I enjoyed this very much, I saw the parents fighting in this as well. ---------------- |
||
|
Juju Member Elite
since 2003-12-29
Posts 3429In your dreams |
That was simply cool. -Juju -Juju |
||
|
pyre Member
since 2008-05-16
Posts 136 |
thank you. should I say what i intended or just leave it open for interpretation? you guys rock. -pyre i really like that picture esoteric being Does she pray? Am I prey? The strength of reality demands honesty and this path is in a shovel... |
||
|
Juju Member Elite
since 2003-12-29
Posts 3429In your dreams |
Well, I think that if you leave dark poetry open ended, it makes it intriguing. In my opinion what makes good dark poetry is to not only have emotion, but to focus it into a message, or a story. The best answer I can give is what kind of poet do you want to be. I could give you answers, but really... poetry is about your soul and how you express your emotions. I liked how you structured the poem. I liked the flow of the poem. I liked your emotion in the poem. -Juju |
||
|
pyre Member
since 2008-05-16
Posts 136 |
thank you. like the slow long approach to the zenith of a well know suicide jump, or all the splattered blood everywhere that has no reasoning or story. Its just thick and everywhere. i get it. Does she pray? Am I prey? The strength of reality demands honesty and this path is in a shovel... |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
