i beg of all to read this. even if you dont comment please just read it

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Sir_Vampire
Member

since 2007-06-12

Posts 96
Johannesburg

0 posted 2007-06-19 04:05 AM

You called me dog, you called me wh*re
You kicked me and hit me then threw me out the door
You beat me until I was numb & felt the pain no more
You treat me like mommy even though I’m just four

You called me b*tch you call me sl*t
You beat me more when I argued ‘but’
Beat me until my mouth swelled shut
Your wedding ring my lips did cut

You hit me harder when I started to cry
I curled up tighter just wanting to die
You replaced the tears with a black eye
Blaming me for mommy saying good bye

My body broken, battered black and blue
You walked away once you were through
All I wanted to do was start a anew
All I wanted to say is I love you…

you watched me bleed you watched me die you watched me not even a bat of your eye

[This message has been edited by Sir_Vampire (06-20-2007 05:00 AM).]

Sir_Vampire
Member

since 2007-06-12

Posts 96
Johannesburg

1 posted 2007-06-19 04:12 AM

i know this poem is pushing the boundaries but please take into consideration that the few words have been censored in a sense but are essential to give the poem its full heart felt story

you watched me bleed you watched me die you watched me not even a bat of your eye

blue face
Member

since 2007-06-03

Posts 92

2 posted 2007-06-19 11:57 AM

Oh my god thats a great poem but
what was horrible did it really happen
and if its true U hope you feel ok

blue face
Member

since 2007-06-03

Posts 92

3 posted 2007-06-19 12:06 PM

I'm sorry about the spelling I
had to write it really fast

tearsofpain
Junior Member

since 2007-05-03

Posts 38

4 posted 2007-06-19 06:01 PM

very nice sad but it is def my cup of tea

hunnie_girl

Member Elite

since 2006-06-18

Posts 2567
Canada

5 posted 2007-06-19 06:13 PM

Really really amazing I liked this a lot.
hunnie.

~fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me~

Alaina
Member

since 2007-06-16

Posts 106

6 posted 2007-06-20 12:46 PM

wow this is really amazing. i'm so sorry if this happened to you, which i think it did because the emotion is amazing. Great poem.

Sir_Vampire
Member

since 2007-06-12

Posts 96
Johannesburg

7 posted 2007-06-20 02:23 AM

i am lucky enough for this not to happen to me, i got the inspriation for this poem from another called misty, do yourself a favor and google "misty poem" the opening line is "i am misty and i am only three" that poem rendered me to tears like no other has

you watched me bleed you watched me die you watched me not even a bat of your eye

aziza
Member Elite

since 2006-07-09

Posts 2995
Lumpy Oatmeal makes me Crazy!

8 posted 2007-06-20 03:11 AM

I am glad that I stopped in. It's a good poem and very important (could you changet the "U" and spell out "you"? -- the "U" distracted me).

Good poem.

Alison

Sir_Vampire
Member

since 2007-06-12

Posts 96
Johannesburg

9 posted 2007-06-20 04:59 AM

Yes sorry i didnt notice it, but will ammend it. thank u all for ur input ~~~{@

you watched me bleed you watched me die you watched me not even a bat of your eye

BrittanyJ
Member

since 2007-06-03

Posts 461
Come find me?

10 posted 2007-06-20 11:33 AM

Such a sad, heart-felt poem! It flowed very nicely, i liked it

There is only so much blood i can bleed for you, and continue to live.

buttercupbaby
Member

since 2006-05-03

Posts 400
outside in the rain

11 posted 2007-06-23 08:35 PM

im so sorry..

amazing writer though.

Twilight Warrior
Member

since 2007-02-22

Posts 106
The World That Never Was

12 posted 2007-06-30 06:53 PM

Tragedy often breeds inspiration, good poem.

"One last drink and the bottle breaks, returning us to the dust from whence we came"

Kira Aso
Member

since 2006-09-26

Posts 351
Closer to Hell...

13 posted 2007-06-30 10:47 PM

This was one of those heart jerking poems that bring tears to my eyes. You did a wonderful job.

~Should the truth be so buried
in the endless cemetery of broken dreams?~

Sir_Vampire
Member

since 2007-06-12

Posts 96
Johannesburg

14 posted 2007-07-13 04:41 AM

i thank all for your much appreciated input and i may i ask a simple favor, Please foward this poem to all who you think might appreciate and let these voices be heard for once.

you watched me bleed you watched me die you watched me not even a bat of your eye

midnightdreamer
Member

since 2008-02-03

Posts 309
Roy,ut

15 posted 2008-02-03 06:35 PM

I love all your poems but this one is something special. I think its really cool that you wrote it about Misty. Sweet writing. keep on the good work!!!

Midnightdreamer

Grinch
Member Elite

since 2005-12-31

Posts 2929
Whoville

16 posted 2008-02-03 07:29 PM

quote:
i know this poem is pushing the boundaries but please take into consideration that the few words have been censored in a sense but are essential to give the poem its full heart felt story

I don’t think the profanity adds anything and using it is probably against the rules of the forum (see below).

As a family-oriented site, we discourage the use of gratuitous profanity. That doesn't mean you won't find a cuss word here and there, but those instances should be relatively rare. In most instances, we find the use of profanity is little more than a sign of laziness. Writers should be able to convey an idea without resorting to an offensive vocabulary, and those who don't usually just aren't trying very hard.

Misspelling a word, using asterisks to mask some or all letters, acronyms or abbreviations, or ANY other attempt to disguise profanity doesn't make it any less profane. If we can discern your meaning from your content, you obviously didn't disguise it enough.

[This message has been edited by Grinch (02-04-2008 03:43 PM).]

Ian L.R. Sanchez
Junior Member

since 2007-07-05

Posts 16

17 posted 2008-02-03 08:32 PM

Wow... this is really sad. Great poem.

XxForever.BrokenxX
Senior Member

since 2008-01-20

Posts 891
Neverland

18 posted 2008-02-03 09:20 PM

that is so sad! I was almost crying. Great...NO! FANTASTIC write!

FoReVeR.BrOkEn

jvj-003
Junior Member

since 2008-02-05

Posts 17
INdia

19 posted 2008-02-05 05:25 AM

A very downright poem... kudos for the candidness of the way in which suffereing is depicted there.....

JVJ

God gives and forgives, we get and foget

1poeticjustice
Junior Member

since 2008-02-04

Posts 14

20 posted 2008-02-05 02:28 PM

Very touching yet horrible. Excellant
blend of pain and suffering.

I too know this childhood hell.

Nicely done.

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