Just the way you taught me

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Dark Poetry #4

Just the way you taught me

Juzjon
Junior Member

since 2006-03-10

Posts 27

0 posted 2006-03-14 04:45 PM

I want to go play baseball
I want to ride my scooter
I want to play some marbles
for I am quite the shooter

But Dad say's son not yet
you've got a lawn to mow
do it just the way I taught you
not too high nor low

And after it's all mowed
you must trim the edges fine
do it just the way I taught you
I want a perfect line

Then I want my car washed
better than last time
do it just the way I taught you
I don't want tar and grime

When finished take the trash out
this time get it right
do it just the way I taught you
make sure the lid's on tight

OK Dad, it's all done
can I now go out and play?
I'll do it just the way Mom taught me
before she passed away

[This message has been edited by Juzjon (03-14-2006 07:30 PM).]

eor
Senior Member

since 2002-09-26

Posts 959
blues & greys

1 posted 2006-03-14 04:49 PM

wow...the last line was not expected, nice erite, very nice. i really felt it, it sent a chill through me. very nice.

A change is going to come...

Juzjon
Junior Member

since 2006-03-10

Posts 27

2 posted 2006-03-14 07:28 PM

If a poet can move only one person each day, then I've done my job. Thanks for the compliment.

Juz

alibaster
Member

since 2001-07-07

Posts 299
In my own private hell...(PA).

3 posted 2006-03-20 01:47 PM

Moved me and moved me again...thank you for a wonderful read.
Until...ali {the Queen of Darkness}

"There is an alter ego which dwells within every soul."-alibaster

"If it doesn't bite, scratch, and make you bleed it isn't worth it"-alibaster

Cherishable_Baybee
Member

since 2006-01-04

Posts 57

4 posted 2006-03-20 04:55 PM

wow this moved me a lot its soo touching at the end i makes me feel sad inside great write...

Juzjon
Junior Member

since 2006-03-10

Posts 27

5 posted 2006-03-20 06:27 PM

Thank you Ali and Cherish

Juz

*Alli4000*

Member Elite

since 2004-03-21

Posts 3188
The World of Poetry

6 posted 2006-03-20 06:57 PM

Excellent write. Keep posting.

~Alli~

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