The man who isn't coming back

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silhouetted
Senior Member

since 2004-01-30

Posts 537
New Zealand

0 posted 2004-10-29 04:54 AM

theres that little girl
hiding in the corner
whispering sweet melodic lies
while she waits for him

shes not quite sure why shes there
or not quite sure where shes been
but she can barely hold on to her dress
to keep it from the dirty floor

the salty tears stain her face
wiping away what she doesn't know is there
but she doesn't care
she never cares when he is near

mirrors all around, but she can't see
for she is blind
to what he has done to her
for what he's made her

she grips her dress in one hand
the bottle in the other
stares the door down
eyes red from her anticiaption

he doesn't know what he does to her
nor she what she does to him
nothing
she does nothing to him but still she waits

grip failing she tries to breathe
in the air he left behind
and she doesn't realise
hes never coming back

but her love keeps her going
keeps her grip for that little while longer
while she waits dirty in her torn dress
for the man that
isn't
coming
back.

put your frustrations into four letter words - incubus

s1nfully_1nn0c3nt
Senior Member

since 2003-10-26

Posts 1105
Watertown, NY

1 posted 2004-10-29 08:22 AM

Wow, It's sad when someone leaves, and u wait, with hope, but the person never returns...Awesome Poem

Happiness Runs From Me, For I Am It's Enemy, Anyone Who Has It, Is Someone I Envy...

Much Luv,
"Trina"

Lexy
Senior Member

since 2003-01-28

Posts 1038
California

2 posted 2004-10-30 12:40 PM

I love that you use the dress in this, it adds so much to the story.
I think sometimes we complain too much that love may have killed us, when really it can also be the only thing keeping us alive.
I loved this.

vampiana
Member

since 2004-09-08

Posts 296
Nothing and Nowhere

3 posted 2004-10-30 02:23 AM

that is so sad...wow Lor, you really are growing in your poetry, its amazing to see..every poem you write..it just gets better and better...i agree..the dress really added to this. you just keep turning your poems up that extra notch everytime. soon they are gonna be too good to even be contained, the notch is gonna break from being turned to much! LOVED IT!
this is going STRAIGHT to my library

love,
Kurst

"I cannot stand the way you tease, I love you though you hurt me so"-Marilyn Manson

Hollow_Emptiness
Senior Member

since 2004-02-01

Posts 715
New Zealand

4 posted 2004-10-30 02:44 AM

Whats good? WHATS GOOD? Everything dammit. Fluck (courtesy to you). Brilliance. I'm sitting here, anxious to grab another glass of crancole from the fridge, kidding myself that my teeth are alright to eat pizza shapes, pondering halloween and crying over lack of pink smokers, and then you go and write this and it makes me sad, making me cry harder, and god love. I...I...I...love this, and you and everything! I better go let that chocolate box dog in right now, she's giving me her sad eyes. Sigh. "Raise your hand in mine, I'll leave when I wanna."

Hope he comes back. I think everyone has someone who has someone that won't come back. I do. You probably do. We cried about it last year. But there are probably others. Good, seeing you next weekend. Your beautiful and...I repeat everything Kurst says (lol). Sigh. YAY. Realplayer swithing to Incubus lol. "Sometimes, I feel the fear of, uncertainty stinging clear. And I, can't but ask myself how much I let myself take the wheel and steer."

Ok Tess, Coming.

Love you, and this poem.

Hollow.
Courts.

I find it kind of funny, I find it kind of sad. The dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had. - Gary Jules, Mad World.

Broken_Winged_Angel
Senior Member

since 2000-04-06

Posts 994
Small Town, Somewhere

5 posted 2004-11-03 08:50 AM

Wow.

I think we've all had someone in our lives we loved someone that we've lost in one way or another.

This one hits rather close to home.

BWA

Your time is here. Take one last look at it, then never come back. This part of your life is already over...

darkness_witch
Senior Member

since 2003-12-03

Posts 516
Underneath

6 posted 2004-11-04 12:09 PM

ooo geez

wow dude, this on hit a couple of chords. ouch.

ok well seeing courtneys reply and realising how great it is had kinda thrown me off writing a great reply so sorry love your just getting the avergae reply

FLUCK DUDE THIS KICKD SUM SERIOUS ASS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! this had to be my fave at the moment aye.

geez you rock my world. hehe I am unworthy:

mwahaha

love and empathy dudette

darkness

nirvana means freedom from pain, suffering and the external world.

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