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icebox
Member Elite

since 2003-05-03

Posts 4383
in the shadows

0 posted 2004-01-07 12:05 PM

When I close my eyes
I see you walking away,
sultry and slow
on a dark crystalline beach in Bali,
moonlight glistens down your thighs;
along the water's edge you turn,
wearing threaded gemstones
and a smile with tip of tongue to lips
satisfaction captured for eternity,
you are just beyond my fingertips;
yasmin scent weaves through the sea breeze,
and the trees
are only whispers and shadows in the night.

©2004 by icebox

Martie

Moderator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-09-21

Posts 28049
California

1 posted 2004-01-07 12:08 PM

icebox...I can see her too, through you.

garysgirl

Member Laureate

since 2002-09-29

Posts 19237
Florida, USA

2 posted 2004-01-07 12:25 PM

yasmin scent weaves through the sea breeze,
and the trees
are only whispers and shadows in the night.

Iceman, this is so pretty.

Hugs

Ethel

A Romantic Heart
Member Ascendant

since 1999-09-03

Posts 5496
Forever In Your Heart

3 posted 2004-01-07 12:30 PM

Oh I loved this one

~ARH

Open your eyes, open your mind, open your heart, let me come in and show you love.....~ARH

*Belabebeautiful*

Senior Member

since 2003-01-03

Posts 696
washington, USA

4 posted 2004-01-07 12:35 PM

so beautiful...sigh...I really enjoyed this, it just kept me captivated the whole time. You have a very good way with words. I could see her and feel the magic of the night, thanks for taking me there.
~Live and Laugh~

Because of you I laugh a little harder, smile a little more, and cry a little less
~Bella~

iliana
Member Patricius

since 2003-12-05

Posts 13434
USA

5 posted 2004-01-07 01:02 AM

Your provoked images that are meaningful to me as we lived in Indonesia several years. Although we never went to Bali, we did visit other islands, and I saw clearly the essense of which you wrote! Thanks.

[This message has been edited by iliana (01-07-2004 11:58 PM).]

Dark Angel
Member Patricius

since 1999-08-04

Posts 10095

6 posted 2004-01-07 01:19 AM

Same. I can see her too.. this is marvelous.

Maree

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

7 posted 2004-01-07 04:40 AM

in another time
she was me

LeeJ
Member Patricius

since 2003-06-19

Posts 13296

8 posted 2004-01-07 07:30 AM

sultry and slow on a beach in Bali,

Well, this poem captured my attention immediately, you mention, ocean, sea, beach or island and I'm there in a flash.

Loved this, very confident and filled with feelings. Great write, and read, please keep that pen flowing.

Midnitesun

Member Empyrean

since 2001-05-18

Posts 28647
Gaia

9 posted 2004-01-07 07:32 AM

Ipanema-like?
Beautiful imagery, enjoyed the brushstrokes.

Ratleader

Member Rara Avis

since 2003-01-23

Posts 7026
Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass

10 posted 2004-01-07 08:37 AM

Now there's a vision to hold onto.

Memories like this are gold....too valuable to wear, but so good to pull out and just look at from time to time.

~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº> ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
______________Ratleader______________

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

11 posted 2004-01-07 08:41 AM

You've made of her a vision,
and a fairy-tale.
Well done, Sir.

Enchantress
Member Empyrean

since 2001-08-14

Posts 35113
Canada eh.

12 posted 2004-01-07 09:04 AM

Very very beautiful...
you made her come alive before our eyes.
Warmed up this cold morning!
Hugs~

In the midst of winter..
I found there lives within me,
an invincible summer.

Kaoru

Member Elite

since 2003-06-07

Posts 3892
where the wild flowers grow

13 posted 2004-01-07 11:05 AM

Ah.. the sweet words of memory. Picturesque, I like that.

Susan Caldwell
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-12-27

Posts 8348
Florida

14 posted 2004-01-07 11:48 AM

Do you think one day we will be able to print out our memories, so they don't fade in time?

Well done Icy!

"if you won't let me fall for you
then you won't see the best that I would love to do for you"
~Dido~

Kahlil
Senior Member

since 2003-04-12

Posts 1881

15 posted 2004-01-07 11:57 AM

"satisfaction captured for eternity"
Beautiful. ~K~

Ravenwolfvoyager
Member

since 2003-12-25

Posts 326

16 posted 2004-01-07 06:53 PM

A wonderful invision indeed. Thank you icebox.

Brad_Smith
Member

since 2004-01-09

Posts 70
Dallas, Texas

17 posted 2004-01-10 12:07 PM

brings to mind a picture a a favorite song of mine Bali-Hi from South Pacific. a warm thought and song

ambrish
Member

since 2003-03-27

Posts 257
India

18 posted 2004-01-10 01:15 AM

and a smile with tip of tongue to lips
satisfaction captured for eternity,
so beautiful.

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