Open Poetry #30 |
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Fragile Rain |
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Greeneyes![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903In Your Poetic Mind ![]() |
In flowers we welcome green fields in gentle glides until day merges with midnight its the synergy of fragments spreading petals in all softness How many Octobers have left him? meeting his shadow? My muse reminded me of the fragrance in bottles lavender floating like feathers from the sky {I studied once, the instructions, they seem distant now from all I remember -- to far from here} Is it within us for the sea to try out sentences lapping endlessly?-- that all this blue goes with out pain? We stand face to face on the dance floor he is betting flowers will fall fragile and darker piers will jut into darker waters funny how that feels to say aloud-- Rain batters the ground I am not sure I really care -- its almost a peaceful sound 'Peaceful' funny how that sounds to say aloud The cutting edge -- I woke at six am – reciting my mind I am not a morning person You say "I understand" Really, you do not ~~**~~**~~**~~**~~ May the miracle of Christmas touch your life with special blessing H A P P Y H O L I D A Y S [This message has been edited by Greeneyes (12-15-2003 11:44 PM).] |
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© Copyright 2003 Lauren~ - All Rights Reserved | |||
Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Lauren, as always..I am speechless... and once again I found I was holding my breath as I read your words. You are a writer with amazing talent! This is indeed another keeper for my library. Hugs~ ~Let peace begin with me... |
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D'sWhisper Member
since 2003-06-16
Posts 68Washington, USA |
You gently tugged my attention towards a vision and feeling I wouldn't of had, had it not been for this poem. Sad...slow and gentle in a darkness that glows enough to see the mistaken. This is just beautiful. ~Whisper~ |
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Sadelite Member Elite
since 2003-10-11
Posts 2519 |
Is it within us for the sea to try out sentences lapping endlessly?-- that all this blue goes with out pain? Wow.... nicely penned, Sadelite |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
My muse reminded me of the fragrance in bottles lavender floating like feathers from the sky {I studied once, the instructions, they seem distant now from all I remember -- to far from here} Is it within us for the sea to try out sentences lapping endlessly?-- that all this blue goes with out pain? We stand face to face on the dance floor he is betting flowers will fall fragile and darker piers will jut into darker waters funny how that feels to say aloud-- ========================================= that all this blue goes with out pain? *whispering yessssss* that line went thru me ..... ![]() ~~~ I am not a morning person ----------- thats because you are a child of the stars. ![]() ![]() I can remember Forever December, The center of dying ... the heart of the pain. The stars surround me ... the cold astounds me. Tabitha's Secret [This message has been edited by Janet Marie (12-15-2003 10:14 PM).] |
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Aimster Member Elite
since 2000-02-19
Posts 4297Charlotte, NC |
Lauren= this hits hard! very powerful, very poignant...you have a true talent for weaving words into more...much more! Take care and Happy Holidays, Amy ![]() "love is like a butterfly-- |
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Nightshade![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2001-08-31
Posts 13962just out of reach |
Awesome write Lauren! Going back to read it again! hugs, Chris ![]() "At the touch of love everyone becomes a poet." |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Lauren...Whenever I read you...I feel such a gentle, yet sure flow to your thinking that I am captured by the fall of your words...sort of like a river. I hope that makes sense. Hugs! |
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BluesSerenade Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549By the Seaside |
Is it within us for the sea to try out sentences lapping endlessly?-- that all this blue goes with out pain? Not funny how that reads to me~ I understand completely, the fragility that you write so eloquently. Thank you for this sentimental write, I felt you here, Lauren. |
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Gentle Spirit Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989 |
Rain batters the ground I am not sure I really care -- its almost a peaceful sound 'Peaceful' funny how that sounds to say aloud The cutting edge -- I woke at six am – reciting my mind I am not a morning person You say "I understand" Really, you do not Lady...amazed again...you tug the strings... ![]() |
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Ericc Member Elite
since 2003-01-31
Posts 4178 |
This is so creative and full of beautiful flowing lines! Eric |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
How many Octobers have left him? ~&~ and how many more will he greet? Well done. |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
Lauren, whenever I look at your photo, I think of ads for Colgate and Maybelline! Writing poetry may not pay well, but your face could bring in a mint! lol ![]() Another poetic masterpiece! Love 'n Light, Linda |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
what an awesome write! I love the last lines...and I love the rain |
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Cpat Hair![]()
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
Bravo dear lady.. bravo... you again leave me without words to reply in any meaningful way.. other than the accolades of well done..and Bravo [This message has been edited by Cpat Hair (12-16-2003 02:15 PM).] |
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Ratleader![]()
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass |
Really....I do! Excellent work here, and I'm glad I picked it up. ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº> ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº> |
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