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Open Poetry #29
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As Darkness Fell
| Open Poetry #29 |
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As Darkness Fell |
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Magnus
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA 
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Cimmerian, smothering gloom inlay the stain of window’s light. Eclipsed by naught as shadows mask Selene, now drawn to Luna’s plight. Where cries bewail the ebbing brine in crawl of tides beyond the edge. As curves do carve the lunate globe wresting the grasp of darkness dredge. Fiery streams illume the land upon their cleave through earthen air as trails of cold comet’s glisten brings from small hearts an oooo and stare. A time there was once of this earth when fear did come upon the lips, as darkness smothered glowing eyes in fright of but a moon’s eclipse. [This message has been edited by Magnus (11-06-2003 10:52 AM).] |
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| © Copyright 2003 Barry J. Tackett - All Rights Reserved | |||
vandana
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463USA |
enjoyed  |
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Ericc Member Elite
since 2003-01-31
Posts 4178 |
Another powerful write. Eric |
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EvocativeVerse2 Senior Member
since 2003-09-10
Posts 1279 |
Hi Barry! Bravo my friend. I love this. I have one small comment and maybe it is dumb but the meter is off in one line. I see you have 8 beats to the line in every line but one. Fiery star streams illume the land This line my friend actually has 9. At least that is what my dictionary says. Fiery counts as 3 beats. Funk & Wagnells Standard Dictionary has it marked as 3 beats. Fiery (Fi'er-/e) Please forgive me for picking on this line. I really do think this is a powerful piece...and damn well worth anyone's effort to read...my eyes just stumbled on this line when reading it and I actually had to stop and think why it caught my eye. If you meant it to be that way I am really sorry. Please forgive me. Remember, if you're not part of the future, you're history! |
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catalinamoon
since 2000-06-03
Posts 9543The Shores of Alone |
Barry, as always, what an interesting write. Well done. Sandra |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Magnus~ Stunning ... compelling ... and just plain gorgeous~ *Huglets* ~*Marge*~ ~*When the heart grieves over what it has lost, |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
a power-packed ending |
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Kaoru
since 2003-06-07
Posts 3892where the wild flowers grow |
Amazing! |
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LeeJ Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296 |
speechless here, what beauty! |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Fabulous poem, Barry! |
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garysgirl
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Excellent writing, as always, Barry. And, I am studying...... Thanks!!  Hugs  Ethel |
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ranidae_poet Member
since 2003-11-05
Posts 66Texas,USA |
wow...again. You keep impressing me. There are only three beings worth of respect; the priest, the solider and the poet; To know, To Kill and to create. |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
A timely poem, given the celestial event that is soon upon us!  A "mag"estic piece of writing, Lord Magnus! Lunar hugs, EA |
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Magnus
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
Thanx to each, you are a blessing to poetry. And here: check this out (if I did this right) http://www.space.com/spacewatch/lunar_eclipse_1_031010.html |
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Kahlil Senior Member
since 2003-04-12
Posts 1881 |
Awesome write and thanks for the url. ~K~ |
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Mistletoe Angel
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
 (big hugggssssssss) Oh Barry, this is powerful, sweet friend, it truly is getting to the darkest time of year and on December 21st in particular, it will all be overwhelming! (sigh) God Bless You, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Barry, thank you for sharing! May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton I don't need no proof when it comes to God and truth |
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