Open Poetry #29 |
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Penny in the Alley |
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Professor Gloom Member Elite
since 2000-07-23
Posts 3082of Depression |
Penny’s Story Part 2 In the glimmer of light that shines in the alley a young female child of about 13 cowers in a dirty corner, A man in black watches from the edge of shadows Whimpering, Comes from down the alleyway With moaning And crying, Nowhere better place to stay. Body frail Skin so pail Straw straight hair of flaxen gold, Rolling tears Many fears, Shivering there in the cold, Surviving. He had thought to recede from all of man, Not having to feel or to understand, To roam the shadows inside the city Abandon the smoothness for the gritty, Sometimes things slip into the realm of night Temporarily falls out of the light Then and there the bright creature needs a hand, A hand of hope and not filled with pity To help make whatever was wrong to right. Enter a middle aged Priest, although also in black he stands out from the shadows, not blending, his small silver crucifix shines Lend a hand to your fellow man Enable them to rise to their own The people are the Lord’s hand Through the righteous builds his home They are the bedrock of the land Spotlight the girl, in a light so bright it glares over her, The priest turns immediately to the light and moves toward the girl, As he goes to help her up, the man in the shadows helps lift her. The Priest carries the girl off, exit stage right, The light begins to fade, Man of shadows tosses a coin into the shrinking pool of light, exits stage left. Gloom |
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© Copyright 2003 Aszard Drazlom - All Rights Reserved | |||
LeeJ Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296 |
Wow wow wow...I liked! Keep this one going...oh please please please ![]() |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Professor, Well done, ![]() |
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Professor Gloom Member Elite
since 2000-07-23
Posts 3082of Depression |
Thank you, LeeJ Pleased you like it, Actually I do have plans to continue this, Not sure when. Thank you, Seymour, Your comments mean a lot to me Gloom |
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Pilgrimage Member Elite
since 2001-12-04
Posts 3945Texas, USA |
Prof- I think it should be 'skin so pale' instead of 'pail'. Otherwise, this is fantastic. You've pulled me right in to the middle of the story. Nan (Pilgrim variety) |
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Professor Gloom Member Elite
since 2000-07-23
Posts 3082of Depression |
Thank you, Pilgrimage, You are correct, my mistake and the spell checker missed it, Thank you for pointing it out, and I’ll change it in the file, but leave it here. Pleased you enjoyed Gloom |
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EvocativeVerse2 Senior Member
since 2003-09-10
Posts 1279 |
Damn! This is great. My #1 must read of the day! This is the first time I have snuck in to check out your stuff Gloom...now I am going to have to start watching for your nick more often. Loved this...can't wait for the next chapter. Remember, if you're not part of the future, you're history! |
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Sadelite Member Elite
since 2003-10-11
Posts 2519 |
Just can't pick a favorite of your many. You keep getting better and better. Sincerely, Sadelite |
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Lotus Breeze Member
since 2003-09-06
Posts 112 |
Your poetic story is very good, but sad and hopeful also. I learn from reading poetry you write and always enjoy |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
damn |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Sir, I read this the other day, but as with the first, as will be with the ones that follow, still finding it very hard to know exactly how to respond. Yes, you're pulling on all the strings. |
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