Sargasso's Travail (Duet) (Magnus and Cpat)

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Magnus

Member Laureate

since 2001-10-10

Posts 14135
South Carolina, USA

0 posted 2003-10-20 06:44 PM

Ron leads in blue....I be the backup...(rear?)

On this night becalmed
It is Sargasso's glass that echoes
The creak of line on mast
Reminding me of us
And the bed in protest of our last.

The night, our last, as storms washed naked shores,
and sands scrubbed the shells of stars.
Stumbling words fell upon ears deafened by sighs
beneath a canopy of Northern Lights.

So called the bell to midnight
with boson's duty fulfilled,
his eyes perhaps as well as mine
searching the Sea
for some memory to sustain his watch
and I,
I wish for wind.

Calm, the once raging Mare, gentle laps
tugging the pitched oaken timbers. Whispering stars
dwelling high above as lightning silently coursed
the darkness beyond the delicate curvature of
earth's horizon....
Where home and the heart lie

till this the nightly watch denotes not passing hour
but lost embrace and gentle smile
kept not as stores to last, but as fresh fruit that quickly spoils
and leaves the stench of once sweet to bitter the nose
and feed only the maggots of what once was my soul.
Come Gale! Devil me with Toil!

For is the wind, that Devil’s wind....to fill the masted main.
As sailors lay, the once clean decks....in hopes to drown of rain.
For in their thirst, their swollen tongues,   the
brine of pewter flow....and from this brine, this killing brine.....
     ....forty souls did their graves go....

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

1 posted 2003-10-20 06:46 PM

Oh gads, my sea legs
have gone weak,
and I swoon!

But I'll be back.

Enchantress
Member Empyrean

since 2001-08-14

Posts 35113
Canada eh.

2 posted 2003-10-20 06:54 PM

FINALLY!!

AND...it was well worth the wait!!
Very much enjoyed the duet from two of Passions more debonair writers.
May I be so bold as to ask for ...more?...please?
~Hugs to you both for this keeper!~

~Autumn, the year's last, loveliest smile~

Janet Marie
Member Laureate

since 2000-01-22

Posts 18554

3 posted 2003-10-20 07:46 PM

*smiling at Suns reply*

tis about time you two combined talents.
Quite the poetic tale, well done groovy guys.

"I've still got sand in my shoes
and I can't shake the thought of you ...
I wanna see you again."

Dido

Patricia
Member Elite

since 2003-04-06

Posts 2160
Missouri

4 posted 2003-10-20 07:48 PM

Into the my library...oh yes, a keeper. You have no idea how long I have been waiting for this!

More...please!

Patricia

Magnus

Member Laureate

since 2001-10-10

Posts 14135
South Carolina, USA

5 posted 2003-10-20 07:52 PM

Sun,  steady you go....rudder amidships...
all stop on both main engines....in other
words....WHOOOAAAAA!!!

Nancy,  sheesh,  how are two guys ever gonna
resist "more"...when you ask so nicely.
Thanx.

JM,  yeah, quite a comic isn't she,  thanx
for the thoughts,  and it was fun with "Mr.
Smooth" though he claims I am...Modesty
and outright lies are figured to come out
at some point....

Patricia,  gee.  what happened,  no two page
discertation?  Don't worry,  I am sure I
can talk him into it again at some point
before we are all old and grey....
Thank You!!!

Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean

since 1999-07-07

Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla

6 posted 2003-10-20 08:01 PM

You guys have written an Epopee. Excellent work.

Martie

Moderator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-09-21

Posts 28049
California

7 posted 2003-10-20 10:22 PM

It's not often that we get the pleasure of a duet such as this, between men. Very well done!! Bravo!

Cpat Hair

Member Patricius

since 2001-06-05

Posts 11793

8 posted 2003-10-21 07:32 AM

well.... many thanks to all...and to Barry for indulging me and my odd time frames for working on this.

Easy to see Barry is the story teller here
and the one who adds the elements of drama that make this piece work...

way to go Mr Smooth!

LeeJ
Member Patricius

since 2003-06-19

Posts 13296

9 posted 2003-10-21 07:43 AM

well, this is a literary sequence capturing my heart....and I hope, and hope and hope you will write more...as the sea is for me, well...simply...sometimes I believe my whole life...smiles and hugs

What a story, brilliant and captivating.
Many thanks for writing and sharing!

Lady In White

Member Elite

since 2001-02-12

Posts 2799
USA

10 posted 2003-10-21 09:13 AM

I think you both blend extremely well, one sets the scene, the other gives presence, and then you slip back and forth, a wave between rocks, allowing the ocean to rush in.

So get over it, admit you two duet excellently, then duet again.

vandana

Member Patricius

since 1999-10-22

Posts 10463
USA

11 posted 2003-10-21 09:36 AM

enjoyed this duet

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean

since 2002-08-27

Posts 40215
Realms of Light

12 posted 2003-10-21 10:21 AM

Well, shiver me timbers, laddies! You done did a mighty fine duet! Mighty fine, indeedo!

You are both master sailors--and poetic craftsmen!

&

Linda

Susan Caldwell
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-12-27

Posts 8348
Florida

13 posted 2003-10-21 10:39 AM

Ahhhh, yes..rolling ship...bouncing off bulkheads...overflowing toilets...going out on deck and letting the salt air slap you in the face...

God I miss it!!

Well done you two...

Susan

"if you won't let me fall for you
then you won't see the best that I would love to do for you"
~Dido~

suthern

Member Seraphic

since 1999-07-29

Posts 20723
Louisiana

14 posted 2003-10-21 11:24 AM

I think smooth is a term equally applicable to both poets... and their finished work! *S* Excellent write...

but you'd better hurry up with another if old and grey are to be outraced. LOL... Sorry... couldn't resist!!! *G* I really meant to say your talents are mature and timeless! *G*

ThisDiamond
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-02-22

Posts 9353
Michigan, USA

15 posted 2003-10-21 12:04 PM

APPLAUSE!!!

Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant

since 2000-04-26

Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium

16 posted 2003-10-21 12:08 PM

this is classy...

much enjoyed...

regards
sudhir

Magnus

Member Laureate

since 2001-10-10

Posts 14135
South Carolina, USA

17 posted 2003-10-21 04:40 PM

I know Ron thanks each of you for the
kindness you have given both of us...and I
thank you as well...This was an enjoyable
manly write, with a brilliant partner...

Thanx Ron...we will do this again...or they
will string us up....remember that, ok?

Mistletoe Angel

Member Empyrean

since 2000-12-17

Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon

18 posted 2003-10-21 11:54 PM

(smiles) Oh Barry and Ron, this is absolutely beautiful, sweet friend, you come sailing beyond the dry tortugas and go starboard side to so many corners of the poetic universe! (big hugggsssssss) You are a wonderful team, sweet friends, God Bless You Both, we all love you so much! You have such beautiful hearts, sweet Barry and Ron, thank you for sharing!

May love and light always shine upon you both!

Love,
Noah Eaton

I don't need no proof when it comes to God and truth
I can see the sun set and I perceive

***Live***

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