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Open Poetry #29
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Spooky House
| Open Poetry #29 |
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Spooky House |
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angelblueyes Member Elite
since 2003-07-19
Posts 2148Oklahoma |
There was a spooky house up on the hill It was so creepy, it gave me chills It was fenced by an iron gate No one had been there as of late My friends and I decided to go What we would find, we didn't know We waited until it got dark And then we snuck across the park We climbed over the top of the wall Being very careful not to fall We started to move towards the door We were ready for adventure and more All of a sudden a girl began to yell We ran so fast and moved so well At the door I pushed and it came open with ease I was saying a prayer to God, oh please We moved into the living room The house seemed to be filled with much gloom We checked out the kitchen and the creaky doors We checked out all of the bottom floor We decided to go and climb the stairs And see what else we could scare We found a masterbedroom on the right It was definetly a creepy sight We were looking all around And then I yelled, here's something I've found It was a letter recieved from a man Saying please, please understand My dear I'm trying to get there to you Try not to be down and blue Please don't take another lover Keep warm underneath the covers Your kisses are embedded in my mind And will be until the end of time Then I found another letter And this one didn't turn out much better My darling I waited for you There was only so much that I could do Know that there was no one else Know that I stayed by myself I'm sorry I didn't make it to see you I'm sorry that I didn't make it through Tomorrow will probably be my last breath I'm sorry I didn't make it through this test Know you're the only man I've ever loved My one true love that I've dreamed of Crystal |
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| © Copyright 2003 Crystal - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Sunnyone Member Ascendant
since 2000-07-06
Posts 5334Staffordshire, England |
Oh Crystal, what a love story this is, and a look into the past...I really enjoyed this read...~S~ Accept these small gifts from my gypsy heart ~S~ |
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BluesSerenade Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549By the Seaside |
Delightful story telling, filled with the wonder of love that never truly dies. Nice writing Crystal~ |
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angelblueyes Member Elite
since 2003-07-19
Posts 2148Oklahoma |
Sunnyone and BluesSerenade:Thank you very much my friends.  Crystal |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
As I began reading this, I was remembering To Kill a Mockingbird... and how many years it took before I could watch parts of it without peeking through my fingers. *S* But I like the turn you took... into a story where love lingers on even after the lives are ended... Well done... I enjoyed! *S* |
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garysgirl 
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Crystal, like suthern, I was getting chills to start with...then you turned it around into a wonderful love story. Beautiful writing, my friend.  Hugs  Ethel |
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Ceinwyn Member Elite
since 2000-07-09
Posts 2175VA |
this reminded me of a movie I saw awhile ago... If at first you don't succeed destroy all the evidence that you tried. |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
You aroused several emotions in me with this write, Dear Crystal, Spinner of Tale Tinglers!  Linda |
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NewEnglandlazurlu Member Rara Avis
since 2002-01-04
Posts 7470A Mountain Paradise |
Crystal ... you are a fine teller of tales and I enjoyed this one very much. Huggles ... Marti Hear Blessings dropping their blossoms all around you. |
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Mon Cherie
since 2001-10-31
Posts 922Land of Never-ending Summers |
Wow, creepy title and spooky beginnings... and what an unexpected ending... Well written, and very much enjoyed. _,,,^.^,,,_ |
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Jason Lyle Senior Member
since 2003-02-07
Posts 1438With my darkling |
A great story an poem! nice job. Jason |
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angelblueyes Member Elite
since 2003-07-19
Posts 2148Oklahoma |
Suthern:I'm glad you enjoyed. Ethel:When this write started that was the intention was for a creepy, kind of errie feeling, but then something hit me and the words just started flowing.  Ceinwyn:Hope it was a good movie. Linda:Thank you, better watch it or you'll have me blushin. Marti:Glad to bring you a little joy. Crystal |
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angelblueyes Member Elite
since 2003-07-19
Posts 2148Oklahoma |
Mon Cherie:I wasn't sure about the twist at the end, but I'm glad you enjoyed. Jason Lyle:Thanks.It was something different for me. Crystal |
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Mistletoe Angel
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
 (big hugggssssssss) Oh Crystal, this made me cry as it is sooooooo beautiful and it saddens me how ever so often houses are never truly haunted, they're just lonely, and those people who live in those lonely houses I feel for so much! (sigh) God Bless You, sweet friend, this is beautiful, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Crystal, thank you for sharing! May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton I don't need no proof when it comes to God and truth |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
FriendGirl~ You can weave a tale !!! Greatly enjoyed~ *Huglets* ~*Marge*~ ~*When the heart grieves over what it has lost, |
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Bonnie j Senior Member
since 2003-06-27
Posts 1588Ohio |
Loved your story.The title caught my eye so I "HAD" to read. Had to keep reading until the very end. Another about this house would be interesting. See Ya Bon-Bon  |
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PsychoticBunni Member
since 2003-10-03
Posts 162Mythical Atlantis |
wow. the beginning was great the ending was awesome all it needs is a car chase. just kidding. it's perfect the way it is. love it. Meg Meg- And the Texan pushed the Mexican out of the plane and screamed, "Long live the ALAMO!!!!!!!!!" |
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angelblueyes Member Elite
since 2003-07-19
Posts 2148Oklahoma |
Noah:I know exactly what you mean my friend.I know this is sad, but what a wondrous thing it must be to truly love someone this way. Marge:Thank you and I'm glad you enjoyed. BonnieJ:Thank you so much and I'll see what I can come up with. PsychoticBunni:Thank you so much.I'm always open to anything. Crystal |
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Magnus
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
I sense that you enjoyed this write. Your mind was certainly dancing throughout and you crafted a pretty fair tale... Better check and lock the doors...and don't forget that the dog is still outside.... |
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