Precipice (Duet by Jason and Littlewing)

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littlewing
Member Rara Avis

since 2003-03-02

Posts 9655
New York

0 posted 2003-08-11 05:09 AM

Violently pitching
from side to side
it hurt
Crawling through the mud
nails caked full of dirt

I look for the horizon
miles of wasteland
is all I see
Soul screaming madly
transparent
I bleed

Did you hear the crack of thunder?
Faster than a whip
Slowly, I can feel
the tightening of the grip

of death
She fell upon my soul
squeezing all my life
out through the hole
in my heart

and I thought, as I climbed
I am stronger than this
it is not fate which I fear,
I stumble
and miss

one more foot
f
a
l
l
towards my horizon
It is what lies behind me
that's marking the miles on

Shall I look back?
I may turn to stone
Or keep bleeding my breath
for that last
gasp
of
hope?

[This message has been edited by littlewing (08-11-2003 05:11 AM).]

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

1 posted 2003-08-11 05:10 AM

good question

nice writing you two!

El_Campeador
Senior Member

since 2003-01-29

Posts 761
Ohio, USA

2 posted 2003-08-11 09:15 AM

You two did a great job together. I can feel the agony and doubts through this poem.

“We are all travelers in the wilderness of this world, and the best that we can find in our travels is an honest friend.” –Robert Louis Stevenson

Nightshade

Member Patricius

since 2001-08-31

Posts 13962
just out of reach

3 posted 2003-08-11 10:33 AM

Bravo you two! Kept me hanging on like a rollercoaster ride right till the end! hugs, Chris

inkedgoddess
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-11-19

Posts 7392
Ohio

4 posted 2003-08-11 04:02 PM

towards my horizon
It is what lies behind me
that's marking the miles on

well done by two of the finest....
and yes, but that's the problem isn't it what lies behind is still there with many of us......cant shake it loose when it sleeps in the same bed.......lol

Aenimal
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-11-18

Posts 7350
the ass-end of space

5 posted 2003-08-11 09:50 PM

Can't lie, i've been waiting for this one awesome guys

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

6 posted 2003-08-11 10:50 PM

and I thought, as I climbed
I am stronger than this
it is not fate which I fear,
I stumble
and miss

one more foot
f
a
l
l
towards my horizon
It is what lies behind me
that's marking the miles on

~*~

You two definitely have a way of getting your message across...but together, you most certainly mark miles...

wranx
Member Elite

since 2002-06-07

Posts 3689
Moved from a shack to a barn

7 posted 2003-08-12 12:14 PM

Very nice...I heard a rumor that this was in the works. Happy to see it.

Ed

dreambuilder
Member

since 2003-03-23

Posts 319
caddyshack

8 posted 2003-08-12 12:20 PM

nice write you guys . . .
hope sometimes is all that we have
liked how you questioned it here though

[This message has been edited by dreambuilder (08-12-2003 12:34 AM).]

garysgirl

Member Laureate

since 2002-09-29

Posts 19237
Florida, USA

9 posted 2003-08-12 12:25 PM

Sue and Jason, your duet sounds very good!!
An excellent work, you two.

Hugs

Ethel

littlewing
Member Rara Avis

since 2003-03-02

Posts 9655
New York

10 posted 2003-08-12 12:44 PM

Thanks Dix . . . yes always questioning

Ben thank you so much . . . just what we hoped for

Chris, thank you - is hard to keep doubt flowing

Michele, indeed yes . . . the past is much more frightening than the future thank you

Thank you Raph . . . see I doubt to? We all do

Thank you Karilea . . . always making me smile . . .

Hey Ed! Thank you so much . . . hmm a lil birdie told ya huh?

Mike - thank you - long time no see
where have you been?

Ethel - thank you

Thanks guys and thank you Jason,
it was his concept entirely and we ran with it . . . was a nice dance indeed and I loved writing with you Jason

Thanks guys
xxoo

Kaoru

Member Elite

since 2003-06-07

Posts 3892
where the wild flowers grow

11 posted 2003-08-12 12:45 PM

Friggin' awesome job you guys..

Makes Meg happy

green_itchy_stuff
Senior Member

since 2003-06-26

Posts 1929
New Caney, Tx

12 posted 2003-08-12 02:43 AM

Brilliant what the two of you have done. Itll make a nice addition.
GIS

a trickle of music from a well
let it spill and roar like hell!

{Lord knows Im a VOODOO CHILD}-JIMI

Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant

since 2000-04-26

Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium

13 posted 2003-08-12 09:19 AM

regards
sudhir

LeeJ
Member Patricius

since 2003-06-19

Posts 13296

14 posted 2003-08-12 09:54 AM

wonderfully penned...only look back to remember those moments that which embraced you...

littlewing
Member Rara Avis

since 2003-03-02

Posts 9655
New York

15 posted 2003-08-12 01:45 PM

Meg - thank you so much and glad it could make you happy

Thank you green . . . nice to see you reading

Thank you Sudhir . . . so sweet

Lee - if it were that easy . . . thank you for your insight truly

thanks guys
xxoo

dreambuilder
Member

since 2003-03-23

Posts 319
caddyshack

16 posted 2003-08-12 04:29 PM

Bump
Bump

Bill Charles
Member Patricius

since 2000-07-11

Posts 10619
highways, & byways, for now

17 posted 2003-08-12 05:05 PM

littlewing - hope is good, and a great write from two good poets...

BC

angelblueyes
Member Elite

since 2003-07-19

Posts 2148
Oklahoma

18 posted 2003-08-12 05:11 PM

An awesome write from two great poet's.Hope is sometimes all there is and looking back can be a disadvantage.
angelblueyes

Jason Lyle
Senior Member

since 2003-02-07

Posts 1438
With my darkling

19 posted 2003-08-12 10:03 PM

Thank you all for the read and the comments, and Sue, thank you for the write, had alot of fun.Was a nice dance indeed.

Jason

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