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Open Poetry #28
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vlraynes
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-25
Posts 8229
Somewhere... out there...

0 posted 2003-09-16 12:16 PM





Ink in bleed of downward flowing
madness growing
with the knowing

endless spiral

down

down

Spin around and catch a moment
quickly fleeting
no repeating

time

gone

Summer answers Autumn's calling
fragments falling
no forestalling

fall

fall

Spin again in dizzy twirling
silver sterling
bites the
bullet

Whole...


~Vicky L. Raynes


When the power of love overcomes the
love of power the world will know peace.
-Jimi Hendrix

[This message has been edited by vlraynes (09-16-2003 03:12 AM).]

© Copyright 2003 Vicky L. Raynes - All Rights Reserved
QjQ
Member Elite
since 2003-04-18
Posts 3756
U.S.A.
1 posted 2003-09-16 01:17 AM


terrific write vicky,, i enjoyed the flow,,

                               

Bonfirelight
Member
since 2003-06-19
Posts 85
London, England
2 posted 2003-09-16 06:37 AM


Great rhythm.
like the wordplay.

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
3 posted 2003-09-16 06:47 AM



Dang it!  You KNEW I'd
get dizzy reading this!

Why did I even click?



inkedgoddess
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-19
Posts 7392
Ohio
4 posted 2003-09-16 07:05 AM



Spin around and catch a moment
quickly fleeting
no repeating

whirling , twirling,
yes it feels like this as its leaving, doesn it? great perception of it all in this very
creative poetry

Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA
5 posted 2003-09-16 08:01 AM


...I'm dizzy, but I like it...

Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
6 posted 2003-09-16 08:20 AM


vlraynes
Wonderful write my dear.

mysticpoe
Senior Member
since 2003-02-28
Posts 883

7 posted 2003-09-16 08:45 AM


hmm... bites the bullet...whole. falling, falling. Like it's all going to pot, and all we can do is ride it out, and bite the bullet - whole. All of it. For we're all in it - together. Nice wake-up write. Enjoyed.

mysticpoe

If nothing is something
then everything is
our thoughts and feelings
and all that exists.

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

8 posted 2003-09-16 09:23 AM


Summer answers Autumn's calling
fragments falling
no forestalling
====================


ahhh...alliterations and rhyme...
the moth is giddy
love your word play and creativity in this piece Vicky-girl..a unique, clever write.

Vertigo is me middle name  lol

"If you hear teardrops falling like rain on the rooftops ...
know what you're listening to ... is me missing you."

JH

littlewing
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655
New York
9 posted 2003-09-16 01:39 PM


Hey Vic . . .
this made me see your words flowing off the page and leaves from the air . . .
looking up to see them dripping from the sky
Beautiful writing, amazing flow
xxoo

Sunnyone
Member Ascendant
since 2000-07-06
Posts 5334
Staffordshire, England
10 posted 2003-09-16 02:40 PM


Oh my...I'm glad I was sitting down when I read this!!!  It amazes me how you combined the words with the format in such a way as to leave me with a falling effect as I read!  All I can say is Brilliant!!!! I love your work, as there is always something innovative and imaginative waiting there to see!!!  ~S~

Accept these small gifts from my gypsy heart  ~S~

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
11 posted 2003-09-16 02:55 PM


Wonderful Vicky!
Even though I do tend to get dizzy easily.
Reminded me of leaves spinning down from the trees.
Expertly penned.
~Smiles & Hugs, Nancy~


~ I love your glances meeting mine
     across forever or the room ~

Mistletoe Angel
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Empyrean
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon
12 posted 2003-09-16 03:33 PM




(smiles) Oh my gosh, I too got my head spinning reading this, sweet friend, it felt like a carousel ride for the leaves on the trees, yay! (kiss on cheek) I love it, sweet friend, here in Colorado the leaves are still green but I can't wait till the colors shine, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Vicky, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

I don't need no proof when it comes to God and truth
I can see the sun set and I perceive

***Live***

Richy
Member Elite
since 2003-05-03
Posts 3050

13 posted 2003-09-16 04:25 PM




Vicky, you really know how to (verti)go, with the flow...

Very clever, and well written!

Richy



Skyfire
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Member Elite
since 2000-12-27
Posts 3381
Riding
14 posted 2003-09-16 04:36 PM



Beautiful write Mum

Life isn't really all that bad... just don't take it too seriously

Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
15 posted 2003-09-16 06:06 PM


VickyBud~
Hey ... I buy that at the drugstore ...
L'Oreal #9~

Excellent workmanship, lady swirl~
*Huglets*
~*Marge*~

~*When the heart grieves over what it has lost,
the spirit rejoices over what it has left.
- Sufi epigram
   noles1@totcon.com   

Ratleader
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026
Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass
16 posted 2003-09-19 02:24 PM


Such a touch you show in this one, blending form and meaning so well that the poem itself is art, not just the words. I am so glad I read this, because in addition to enjoying, I found a lesson in the craft.

~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>   ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>  ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº>    ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
______________Ratleader______________

angelblueyes
Member Elite
since 2003-07-19
Posts 2148
Oklahoma
17 posted 2003-09-19 02:25 PM


The words and the flow were awesome.
Crystal

Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
18 posted 2003-09-19 08:56 PM


Vicky..I'm so glad this came back up ...since I missed it before.  What a great feel it has!  
Magnus
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135
South Carolina, USA
19 posted 2003-09-19 09:38 PM


Vicky,  this does come very close to making
my head spin.....

Very nicely done....

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