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Open Poetry #28
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I Can Close My Eyes.......duet with Dark Angel (Maree)
| Open Poetry #28 |
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I Can Close My Eyes.......duet with Dark Angel (Maree) |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California 
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I can close my eyes and feel the silk of her hair, her complaint plaited by my patience. See how the part is crocked in the back? There are no straight lines in a memory, but I swear there is a scar where her brown eyes lingered true and straight while daring the brush. Buzzing like the wings of a dragonfly on the edge of time wandering the land, her eyes lighting all they touch, she gathers yellow flowers filled with night and its water, they rustle against her skirt tassel-like. Watch me, she says. I can make my hair dance. Turn around and then again, caught in the air of time, her hair a rope or a bridge to climb, to cross her excellent eyes. She did not tell me this; it was not til later that I found out that many things are possible when you close your eyes. How the pull of life tilts it’s to-and-fro rhythm in wait of an irregular clock. You can find her stirring there upon the blades of grass being what I have not yet been, taking root and waiting for me. She is at the edge of sight, on the cusp of a single strand of silk, lit by love whose brush stokes pass the slant and light the close of eyes with perfect lamp, and I can close my eyes. [This message has been edited by Martie (08-24-2003 10:59 PM).] |
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| © Copyright 2003 Martie Odell Ingebretsen - All Rights Reserved | |||
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BluesSerenade Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549By the Seaside |
She is at the edge of sight, on the cusp of a single strand of silk, lit by love whose brush stokes pass the slant and light the close of eyes with perfect lamp Martie and Maree~ Your duetting is such a pretty sight to be hold. So so nicely done you two~ |
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icebox Member Elite
since 2003-05-03
Posts 4383in the shadows |
This made me smile, and laugh and even brought a wistful tear. Bravo! |
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Ratleader
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass |
Angels do sing. This is utterly breathtaking. I had the pleasure of reading a draft, so I knew we were in for a treat with this one....but even with that preparation, I didn't know it would be this beautiful. Thank you, and thank you. ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº> ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº> |
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Patricia Member Elite
since 2003-04-06
Posts 2160Missouri |
Dear ladies, this is magnificent work...I sat here with jaw dropped in the three times I read this piece. Maree, Martie...Goodness, I am completely speechless. Going back for another jaw drop right now. Incredible!!!! Patricia |
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Aenimal Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-18
Posts 7350the ass-end of space |
two of pip's most brilliant meet and meld..fantastic |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Thank you, Maree for writing with me...it was a pleasure...you are wonderful! |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
Ladies, we need another please? This was wonderful. |
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Kaoru
since 2003-06-07
Posts 3892where the wild flowers grow |
I ditto Raph's comment.. this is fantastic. |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
Martie...it was a pleasure and a real honour to write with you sweet lady. Thank you... love you heaps  Ms Blues, icebox, Ed, Raph, Sharon and Meg... thank you all so very much for your lovely replies and for stopping in to read both Martie and I. much appreciated. Maree  fate is not just |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
I'm smiling - You ladies are both awesome writers...  |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Smooth chocolate cream... the browns in this made me smile... and the plaiting made me remember... and the hair... dancing... made me smile...again. |
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Bill Charles Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619highways, & byways, for now |
Martie - you write well together, this is special... She did not tell me this; it was not til later that I found out that many things are possible when you close your eyes. Many things are possible when one closes their eyes, it's a shame that they aren't at times when eyes are open... BC |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
Buzzing like the wings of a dragonfly on the edge of time wandering the land, her eyes lighting all they touch, she gathers yellow flowers filled with night and its water, they rustle against her skirt tassel-like. Watch me, she says. I can make my hair dance. Such vivid imagery, such a tender, touching write... this is one to linger on the heart. Ladies, this is magnificent! |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Martie You two write magic. |
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garysgirl
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Martie and Maree...this is pure magic. Just beautiful. I hope you two ladies don't mind if I keep it to read again and again.  Hugs to you both  Ethel |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Lori...Thank you pretty lady! icebox....if it brought you all that, then we did good! Ed...What a wonderful thing to say! Patricia...Incredible is a word I like..thank you. Aenimal...Maree is brilliant, I am just me..and thanks for such a high compliment. Sharon...I'd love to duet again with Maree! Kaoru---to ditto Raph is a good thing..thanks! Nan...thanks for the smile. Bill...sometimes they are! suthern....I hope that this is true...it has special meaning to me, and I hope the reader feels it too. Sy....You reply magic! Ethel...I sure would be honored if you would keep this to read, I'm sure Maree would be too...thank you. |
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wranx Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689Moved from a shack to a barn |
Yes! Two remarkable women, and one remarkable write. "Watch me, she says. I can make my hair dance. Turn around and then again, caught in the air of time, her hair a rope or a bridge to climb, to cross her excellent eyes." I don't know or care which of you wrote this small wonder. Just know, that it is merely one bijou among many. Superb! Hugs to both! And a thank you, for sharing. Ed |
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Mistletoe Angel
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
 (big hugggssssssss) Oh Martie and Maree, this is sooooooooooo beautiful, sweet friends, this made me cry imagining the summertime caress like a mothers loving touch to her litrle daughter! (smiles) This made me cry as it is just gorgeous, sweet friends, I love this, this is a classic, yay, we all love you both so much! You have such beautiful hearts, sweet Martie and Maree, thank you for sharing! May love and light always shine upon you both! Love, Noah Eaton I don't need no proof when it comes to God and truth |
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vlraynes Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-25
Posts 8229Somewhere... out there... |
You two are wonderful, as is this duet. I absolutely love it. Hugs to you both... "My friends are my estate." |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Maree & MartieSis~ I saw her dancing ... on tip-of-toeing through the beauty of the thoughts so tenderly poured forth from you both~ 'Watch me, she says. I can make my hair dance. Turn around and then again, caught in the air of time, her hair a rope or a bridge to climb, to cross her excellent eyes. She did not tell me this; it was not til later that I found out that many things are possible when you close your eyes.' Preciously, preciously tender~ *Huglets* to you both~ ~*Marge*~ ~*When the heart grieves over what it has lost, |
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Goodknight Member Elite
since 2002-06-15
Posts 2386Ohio, USA |
this is fantastic - great - out of sight - well guess you get the idea - loved this - you two did it great - Paul |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
A lovely collaboration that elicited a plethora of emotions in me.  & EA |
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littlewing Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655New York |
and how this passed my watchful eye, I shall never know, byt glad I found it here . . . would be shame in itself to miss this one You can find her stirring there upon the blades of grass being what I have not yet been, taking root and waiting for me. I cannot tell where the root begins and the flower blooms . . . amazing, the both of you xxoo |
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