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Open Poetry #28
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Martie
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California

0 posted 2003-08-22 08:25 PM


A Canary Watches The Passing of the Sun

In the room the table
is heavy
legs folded and tucked

The canary sings in its center
he tells the sun the time
singing to the yellow sash of the eastern curtain
that watches the apple tree
how drenched with fruit he sees for certain

I have no lover but warble true says bird
Reflecting to the dark side of the pond
I hold the evening still within is the reply
the frogs den and the fish cease swim
in my shadow water’s song
come along with me and see your own reflection
cast in prisms care the beauty is love’s perfection

Just as morning ends and hits cement with hot
the trees dance away the sky
leaving you and I in dappled light
easing over the roof to night

The fire takes the air in front
and sparks it into the crystals slant
across the room as if in dance
canary sings to lights like fairies
laced with his sweetest vocabulary
forgeting for now the pond out back
for in the pond he sees his lack

Sun dares to dip behind the traces
palm soldiers tall with headdress faces
erect not bothered by the passing
movement of the wind fan dancing
the clouds now all swept into place
as if a child’s crayon traced
the colors of the human spectrum
until they mix in genuflection

[This message has been edited by Martie (08-22-2003 08:34 PM).]

© Copyright 2003 Martie Odell Ingebretsen - All Rights Reserved
Enchantress
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since 2001-08-14
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Canada eh.
1 posted 2003-08-22 08:46 PM


"Sun dares to dip behind the traces
palm soldiers tall with headdress faces
erect not bothered by the passing
movement of the wind fan dancing"

Beautiful sweet Martie...and these words
absolutely dance off the tongue.
What fantastic imagery!
~Summertime Smiles & Hugs, Nancy~

~The breeze that kissed you on the face,
    Has held me in the same embrace~

serenity blaze
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since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

2 posted 2003-08-22 08:49 PM


"forgeting for now the pond out back
for in the pond he sees his lack"

oh Martie...

smile

you do a sweet haunting of self. (even if it is MY self-- )



oh yes...love this much.


Janet Marie
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since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

3 posted 2003-08-22 10:26 PM


Just as morning ends and hits cement with hot
the trees dance away the sky
leaving you and I in dappled light
easing over the roof to night

The fire takes the air in front
and sparks it into the crystals slant
across the room as if in dance
canary sings to lights like fairies
laced with his sweetest vocabulary
forgeting for now the pond out back
for in the pond he sees his lack

Sun dares to dip behind the traces
palm soldiers tall with headdress faces
erect not bothered by the passing
movement of the wind fan dancing
the clouds now all swept into place
as if a child’s crayon traced
the colors of the human spectrum
until they mix in genuflection


===============================

HOLY COW...what did you have for dinner???
*shaking me mothy head*
Not only do I wanna ask how you write like this, but how do you find such a high level of inspire to set this off.
I am moth giddy..Martie rhymed and reading this aloud made me high.
You rock..and it rolls me  

You're going to hear my voice in the morning calling your name ...
and know my love and my desperation were one and the same.

JB

Sunshine
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since 1999-06-25
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Listening to every heart
4 posted 2003-08-23 08:01 AM



And I love how
this eases into the sing-song
of the canary, and the rhyme
starts so innocently, and ends
upon the climb...up.



Thank you, my friend...

Nan
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since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA
5 posted 2003-08-23 08:50 AM


You give twilight new meaning, m'friend...
Dark Angel
Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095

6 posted 2003-08-23 08:53 AM


Jeez Martie.... I want to write like you!

simply beautiful!

you bring out the exclamations in me heh.

Maree

PS. keeping this.

fate is not just
whose cooking  smells good
but which way the wind blows

(Ani DiFranco)


Seymour Tabin
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since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
7 posted 2003-08-23 09:18 AM


Martie
This is pure Martie.

Goodknight
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since 2002-06-15
Posts 2386
Ohio, USA
8 posted 2003-08-23 10:44 AM


You write very special poetry Martie - your imagery is amazing and I loved the sound of this wonderful poem - Paul
Marge Tindal
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Florida's Foreverly Shores
9 posted 2003-08-23 12:16 PM


MartieSis~
You simply give everything new meaning~

This one popped to the TOP TEN OF THE Martiesque Moments~

15 reads and growing~
Printed, framed, hung~

I love you~
*Huglets*
~*Marge*~

~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com

Midnitesun
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Gaia
10 posted 2003-08-23 01:22 PM


WOW! Martie, this is superb, in every way.
The imagery, the flow, the content.
This will be one of my all-time favorites.
I bow to the master.


wranx
Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689
Moved from a shack to a barn
11 posted 2003-08-23 01:27 PM


I'll only say (again) how very talented you are. Wish I could infuse similar flavor into my own poor scribbles...

Ed...

Mistletoe Angel
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Portland, Oregon
12 posted 2003-08-23 06:56 PM




(big hugggsssssss) Oh Martie, this is beautiful, sweet friend, I love canaries and I used to have one but mine died last summer! (sad sigh) You truly live with the spirit of that sweet little girl inside you, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Martie, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

I don't need no proof when it comes to God and truth
I can see the sun set and I perceive

***Live***

Ratleader
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13 posted 2003-08-23 09:16 PM


Some of us count on paper and some of us write arithmetic...a few manage to scribble a bit of algebra.

This is calculus.

Beautifully done, m'lady. Excellent stuff from first syllable to last.

~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>   ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>  ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº>    ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
______________Ratleader______________

Martie
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since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
14 posted 2003-08-23 09:24 PM


My thanks, poet friends...it's funny, but this was one that I was not pleased with and almost put away as a lost cause.  Thankyou for seeing something in it that I didn't...and givig my muse a more positive attitude...I appreciate it!  Oh, and Ed...I am not good at any kind of math...so thanks for the compliment to my numbers.  Hugs to all!
Ratleader
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Member Rara Avis
since 2003-01-23
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Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass
15 posted 2003-08-23 09:33 PM


Tsk....Picasso used to say the same thing about his paintings.....that wasn't true either!

~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>   ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>  ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº>    ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
______________Ratleader______________

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