Front Porch Voice Learning to Speak

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Open Poetry #28

Front Porch Voice Learning to Speak

Kaoru

Member Elite

since 2003-06-07

Posts 3892
where the wild flowers grow

0 posted 2003-08-21 03:49 AM

Back to
front porch
swinging
sipping
on a juicy
tangerine

in my own
little world
just imagining
how nice it'd be
if the sunset
were this orange
everyday.

i learned about
half-pound snails
in Africa and
they slithered much
like my
own mind does..

leaving a trail
of thoughts
behind me

i wondered
often
if i could
gain the legs
of a
forest millipede

scatter away and
forget my memory.

and watch the trees
hang themselves
with knarled branches

overflowing

like the river

of this
juice from a
front porch
tangerine.

MERCURY
Member

since 2003-04-16

Posts 190
Ireland

1 posted 2003-08-21 05:05 AM

Absolutely FANTASTIC. "Watching the tress hang themselves" is a flipping wonderful image. Great poem (Really, usually i dont read other poetry, but i am so so so glad i read your beautiful poem). I hope it rains where you are so that you can shower in Gods praise).

green_itchy_stuff
Senior Member

since 2003-06-26

Posts 1929
New Caney, Tx

2 posted 2003-08-21 05:44 AM

I liked the imagery. Youre this good at your current age. I can only imagine how much better youll be in 20 years.

GIS

a trickle of music from a well
let it spill and roar like hell!

{Lord knows Im a VOODOO CHILD}-JIMI

gemjop
Member Elite

since 2002-11-18

Posts 2587
Pencilveinia, USA

3 posted 2003-08-21 07:27 AM

i learned about
half-pound snails
in Africa and
they slithered much
like my
own mind does..

leaving a trail
of thoughts
behind me

Never leave pip? Love reading you think out loud. clever write meg. library.

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean

since 2002-08-27

Posts 40215
Realms of Light

4 posted 2003-08-21 08:36 AM

Gem hit the snail, I mean "nail", on the head. It is as if you are thinking out loud! That makes for intimate poetry!

I think I'll go have a tangerine...

Lovin' hugs 'n smiles,
EA

Susan Caldwell
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-12-27

Posts 8348
Florida

5 posted 2003-08-21 10:05 AM

"i learned about
half-pound snails
in Africa and
they slithered much
like my
own mind does..

leaving a trail
of thoughts
behind me"

Those words are fantastic! I do love your mind..

Susan (I just realize today that I have kids your age....sigh)

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